WWE Survivor Series 2002
November 17th 2002, Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,930
Match 3: Hardcore match for the WWE Women's Championship - Trish Stratus (C) vs Victoria
There's trash cans full of weapons tied to each ring post.
Victoria Pearl Harbours Trish while she's taking her jacket off, choking and ragdolling her with it. She finds a broom. JR: "You gonna ride that broom or you gonna use it?" We get a knuckle lock style spot with the broom. Victoria gets the advantage, choking Trish all the way up to the top rope, only to be pulled off. Trish finds a can lid but Victoria whacks it into her face with the broom. Outside the ring she whips Trish into one of the trash cans! Slingshot legdrop back inside gets 2. King: "The last time Victoria got whistled at was right before a train hit her." Cover your ears Sforcina!
Victoria props a trash can in the corner, only for Trish to catapult her into it. Trish finds an ironing board, whipping Victoria into it then gets a front kick for 2. Singapore cane time! She's whippin' Victoria like a Government Mule! King: "Poor Government mule." JR: "Never get a break do they?" Victoria's got a busted nose & WHACKS Trish with a bin lid. She blocks an attempted Stratusphere in the corner, only to get hit with a lid as she pulls Trish up. Nice! Powerbomb by Victoria, who finds a mirror only to get chick kicked for 2. Trish gets caned looking for more weapons, then hits a "modified" (read: botched) bulldog for 2. Victoria escapes outside and blinds Trish with a fire extinguisher, then hits a snap suplex for the 3!!
Winner: Victoria (new champion, first reign)
Verdict: 6.5/10. Everything was fine until the botches near the end and the abrupt finish. Victoria said she couldn't find the weapon she wanted for the finish and had to improvise. This was still appreciably physical.
* Coach asks Bischoff backstage what to expect from the Elimination Chamber: "History and the future all in one night". He says he's outdone Smackdown GM Stephanie McMahon AND himself before Big Show interrupts, telling Bischoff he'll prove trading him away was a big mistake by winning the title.
* BRRRROCKK LESSSSNAAAAARRR is warming up in the back with taped ribs. His agent Paul Heyman is very nervous, clutching Lesnar's title. He says nothing's been the same since Hell in the Cell but to put that behind them - they're in the Garden. New York City! Heyman promises "my client" will walk out champion."BUT WHO'S SIDE IS HE ON!?"
* Video package for the WWE title match highlights the Hell in the Cell last month between Lesnar and Undertaker, and Show's path of rage twatting Taker, Rikishi, Matt Hardy, Rey Mysterio and twice putting Lesnar through tables. He also did his trademark "say how big I am real slowly" promo: "I'm seven... foot... tall... five... hundred... pounds". Heyman says Brock can't manhandle, suplex or F-5 the Big Show, and he's got a broken rib. We also see Brock BATTER Show on the go home Smackdown, opening a gash in his arm charging him into the steps and hitting a BRUTAL unprotected chairshot.
Match 4: WWE Championship Match - Brock Lesnar (C) (w/ Paul Heyman) vs Big Show
State of Show in his slacks. Lesnar got a good pop even though he's not officially face yet.
They go nose to nose and stalemate on lock ups. MSG: "LET'S GO LESNAR!" Show finally overpowers Brock with a HUGE beale, but then speared down. Show tries a chokeslam but Lesnar sidesteps and BACK SUPLEXES BIG SHOW! So Brock CAN suplex the Big Show. He then counters an assalanche into a GERMAN SUPLEX. Good lord. Show blocks the F-5 though, battering the injured ribs and accidentally sending Brock into the ref. Lesnar ducks a big boot and FRICKIN' BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEXES SHOW!!
Heyman throws in a chair and Cole reminds us Lesnar is still unbeaten. Another chokeslam blocked. Lesnar tries a chairshot but Show punches it away! He gets it the second time though, and HOLY SHIT LESNAR HOISTS SHOW UP... FOR THE F-5!!! A new ref is out. 1... 2... HEYMAN PULLED THE REF OUT! Lesnar's pissed and gives chase, but runs right into chairshots to the ribs from Show. Chokeslam to the chair! The original ref is back. 1.. 2.. 3!!!
Winner: Big Show (new champion, second reign)
Verdict: 6/10. Holy shit, that was over in a flash but what a showcase for what a BEAST Lesnar is. Very watchable even if nice spots like Show punching the chair away got glossed over. They'd do better next year.
* Heyman and Show immediately high tail it into a limo. Wise move.
* Video package for the tag team title match is basically just highlights of the Smackdown Six killing it every week and Angle & Benoit's dissention.
Match 5: Triple Threat Elimination Match for the WWE Tag Team Championships - Edge & Rey Mysterio (C) vs Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit vs Los Guerreros (Eddie & Chavo)
FFS we see "newly engaged" Al Wilson and Dawn Marie in the crowd. I forgot Edge's fans were called the Edge Army. Only two men allowed in at once but you can tag anyone.
The Guerreros stir the shit at the start only to sit things out, while Angle hugs Benoit again. Benoit & Rey start. Rey's slippery but eventually gets caught by MASSIVE chops. A hurricanrana and flapjack allow him to tag Edge for a double hip toss. Benoit tags Angle who suffers a huge BAAACK body drop, so he tags Chavo. Nice! A freshly tagged Rey springboard splashes him for 2. Big face first press by Chavo lets him tag Eddie, who batters Rey only for Mysterio to go around the world (well Eddie) for a head scissors. Holy shit that was smooth.
Big monkey flip to Eddie, so he tags Kurt. MSG: "LET'S GO ANGLE". Another head scissors by Rey, then Angle randomly hit the post shoulder first (pet hate) and messes up throwing Rey up to the top rope. Quick tags between Angle & Benoit isolate Mysterio, working over his neck. Nice arm drag to counter the Angle Slam, but then Kurt clotheslines Rey's socks off. Front chancery RESTHOLD. FOREVER. Rey eventually escapes, wheelbarrows Angle, somersaults out of an attempted German and gets a spin wheel kick. Nice! Angle tried tagging the Guerreros so they jump off the apron haha.
Tags to Edge & Benoit! Edge cleans house and shit cans Chavo. Rey and Eddie take each other out with a Frankensteiner to the outside. Spear... countered to a simultaneous ankle lock and crossface!! Rey saves with a seated senton, and corkscrew plancha's Angle & Chavo! Benoit with German suplexes to Edge, only for Eddie to sunset flip Benoit whilst he German's Edge! Cool spot for 2. More suplexes from Benoit, who goes up for the headbutt on Edge, but Eddie sneaks in with the froggy splash! Benoit headbutts Eddie!
Angle with the Angle Slam and ankle lock on Eddie. The ref tries to get them out. Meanwhile Benoit has the crossface on Edge, but Chavo hits him with the tag belt, then chucks it to Angle - so Benoit thinks Kurt did it! Rey dropkicks them into each other, then hits an ace baseball slide head scissors on Chavo. Spear by Edge to Benoit! 1... 2... 3! BENOIT & ANGLE ELIMINATED
Angle's pissed and Angle Slams Edge as Benoit suplexes Rey. They argue to the back and Eddie covers for 2, followed by a heelo for another 2. Tazz says the Guerreros were smart letting the others start as they've still fresh. Eddie & Chavo double team Edge with sneaky tactics and RESTHOLDS only to eat a double flapjack. Tag to Rey! HIGH springboard crossbody. He uses a wheelbarrow on Eddie to hurricanrana Chavo. Nice! Edge spears both Guerreros in the corner. They set Eddie up top, and Edge elevates Rey up through an alley oop so he can hurricanrana Eddie! 1... 2... Chavo saves it!
619 to Eddie! But Chavo whacks Rey with the belt when Rey tried the West Coast Pop. Edge then furiously beats on Chavo. Meanwhile Eddie lock in the Lasso from El Paso on Rey... and Rey taps!
Winners: Los Guerreros (new champions, first reign)
Verdict: 8.5/10. Nice touch that the Guerreros used the belts to eliminate both teams and win them. Really these guys could do no wrong at this time. Barring a couple of flubs and (tiny) death spots this was pure class.
* Chris "I went to Harvard don't you know?" Nowinski is out. JR says he needs a haircut! He chides New Yorkers for their "street smarts". That's not real intelligence - you can' buy it like the Yankees bought their World Series titles! CHEAP HEAT. NYC: "SHUT THE FUCK UP".
* OMG he's now interrupted by Matt Hardy Version ONE-AAAAH! Did you know: Matt keeps the room temperature at a toasty 75 degrees? And only drinks low fat chocolate milk? He says New Yorkers aren't stupid... they're losers! They're such losers "they're SUCKING THE MATTITUDE OUT OF ME... right now, I'm choking worse than the Knicks". CHEAP HEAT. JR: "I don't know about that." King: "Hard to do, isn't it?" They go back and forth over who's right, Matt pointing out losers in the crowd. King: "Who's he pointing at, Tazz?" Inevitably they decide New Yorkers are both and celebrate.
* Somebody called an ambulance to a big pop. Oh no wait... it's BIG POPPA PUMP SCOTT STEINER!!! Business just picked up. He suplexes the fuck out of both guys. Steiner: "Who da man!?" He shit cans Nowinski ("Ha!") then presses Matt onto him. PUSH UPS. He dedicates this to all his freaks in New York City. "Big Poppa Pump is your hook up. Holla if ya hear me!"
* The Chamber is lowering. JR: "The brutality of Hell in the Cell, the unpredictability of War Games, the tradition of the Survivor Series and the importance of the World Title."
* Terri's chasing Shawn Michaels in the back, asking why he believes he can win. Shawn's adorable here. "Why do I believe? Little lady, are you kiddin' me?"... but before we get an answer we get an important RNN injury update from Randy Orton! Oh yes. If they wanted to keep Bo Dallas relevant during his injury they should have given him this gimmick. Orton thanks the sexy flight attendant for that extra pillow for his injured shoulder, giving a cheesy wink! He pleads for more get well emails.
* Video package for the Chamber match, showing its construction before breaking into Saliva's song again! HBK's comeback from Summerslam is highlighted in particular.
* Coach is with Triple H and Ric Flair backstage. H says he was awarded the title because he's the best and has beaten everyone to prove it, but it's not good enough so now he's facing five of the best ever in the Chamber. He'll still be champ at the end because he's that damn good!
* Bischoff comes out into the fully descended Chamber to explain the rules: four men are confined to internal pods, locked behind "bullet-proof plexiglass" (we'll see...), while the other two start the match. A pod opens every five minutes. Elimination is by pin fall or submission.
Main Event: Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Championship: Triple H (C) vs Rob Van Dam vs Shawn Michaels vs Chris Jericho vs Booker T vs Kane
Jesus that was a load of filler! Continuing the "Survivor Series: brought to you by Saliva" theme of the evening, they play Y2J to the ring live from The World (the Dudleys also had a Saliva song as their theme, they're all over this show). JR mentions every championship match tonight has resulted in a title change - not a good omen for HHH. Both he & King don't know what to expect and neither do the men in the Chamber. They also get over that Bischoff created this match to top Stephanie and last month's Hell in the Cell.
RVD and Triple H start. Van Dam controls with kicks as NYC chants his name. Facebreaker by Hunter, who goes for a Pedigree but gets backdropped over the top to the steel floor! Ouch. RVD keeps sending him into the Chamber door, nearly breaking it open as it's only locked with a tiny latch haha. Rob does his shoulder routine then monkey flips H on the steel. God damn! Rolling Thunder from the ring to the steel on Triple H! He then tells Jericho to fuck himself and climbs up his pod! Y2J's not amused and pulls his leg through the chain roof into his pod. Van Dam fights out, and hits a heelo from the top on HHH to the steel!! The countdown is on for the next entrant...
...it's Jericho! But he runs right into a kick from RVD and gets sent to the steel. He goes up top for a crossbody... Jericho ducks but HOLY SHIT Van Dam hangs on to the chain wall and crossbodies Jericho off the wall!!! Spider-Rob! The heels then start double teaming RVD, with a knee and senton combo getting 2. King points out since it's not a one fall match no one's gonna save people from falls. Y2J: "C'MON BABAY!" The heels keep whipping RVD into the chain walls. Y2J: "C'mon you sunnofabitch I'm the King of the World!" Hebner: "C'mon dammit!" Van Dam comes back, flipping out of a corner double team and kicking Jericho. JR: "I'll be surprised if Jericho has any teeth left when this one's over." The count's on again...
Booker T is out next. He cleans house with kicks and clotheslines. SPIN-A-ROON-I! After a nice evasive exchange he trades kicks with Van Dam for near falls. JR: "Van Dam... he's like trying to pour smoke through a keyhole." Scissors kick to Triple H! Jericho takes out Book, only to be taken out by RVD. Van Dam climbs... oh God all the way to the top of the pod! "Yano... To... Ru!" Wait that's not right...
Oh no that's it - "Rob... Van... Dam!" FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH FROM THE POD TO HHH!!! That killed RVD's knee and crushed HHH's throat. Booker missle dropkicks Van Dam from the top... and that gets 3! RVD ELIMINATED
That was a bit lame, and got Booker some boos. JR: "Van Dam literally took himself out of the competition with that Five Star Frog Splash." King: "He should have never gone that high." Story of his career... Booker tries covering Hunter too, but only gets 2 because the ref was getting Van Dam out of the Chamber. Y2J bulldogs Booker and goes for the Lionsault, but Book rolls away and hits a wicked whiplash spinebuster, slowly covering for 2 as the count is on again...
THAT'S GOTTA BE KANE! JR: "Now he's gotta beat on three men." *whit-woo* He sends Jericho to the steel and snake eyes him into the chains. He then throws Jericho into a pod and THE PLEXIGLASS BREAKS!! That had the crowd in awe, you could see Kane grinning at how well that went (SEND FOR THE MAN!). Booker escapes a powerslam only for Jericho to low blow him through the ropes. Chokeslam to Booker! Lionsault by Y2J. 1.. 2.. 3! BOOKER T ELIMINATED
JR: "This is one of those situations where careers are gonna be changed - I hope they're not shortened! But they're gonna be changed after tonight." Kane Flair-presses Hunter off the top. Jericho escapes a chokeslam with a low blow and second rope dropkick for 2 as a huge HBK chant erupts. The count is on, we know who's next. JR: "His second match in four years".
HBK is out! King: "He's hitting everything in sight". Backdrop to Y2J only to be clotheslined by Kane. Flying forearm by Shawn. Smark in the crowd: "You suck Shawn!" Kane flips him inside out with a whip to the corner... and chokeslams him. And Jericho. And Triple H! Throat slash! He goes to Tombstone H, but Hunter slides out & pushes him into Sweet Chin Music! Kane sits up! Pedigree! King: "He won't sit up from this." Jericho then gets a MASSIVE LIONSAULT three quarters across the ring for 3! KANE ELIMINATED
THAT'S a monster elimination. Y2J clotheslines HBK out to the steel to a nasty bump, and the heels then double team him and bust him open. H grinds him into the chains. Y2J: "Grate his head like a cheese grater!" Shawn fights back, clotheslining Triple H back in the ring. He tries to piledrive Jericho on the steel (are you MENTAL!) but Jericho backdrops out of it. JR: "Sometimes I think concrete would be nicer." Flying forearm to Hunter in the ring. Nip up! But Jericho comes in and bulldogs him. Lionsault! 1... 2... NO! JR: "Shawn Michaels is still a believer!"
Beautiful moonsault by Shawn for a near fall. He puts Jericho in the Walls of Jericho! But HHH DDTs him off. Jericho covers but H pulls him off because he wants to eliminate Shawn. Y2J: "We're gonna kick his ass!" The shoving match eventually becomes a fight. Clothesline by HHH (that Jericho was blatantly meant to duck) then a facebreaker for 2. Pedigree... countered to the Walls! HHH is in agony. He crawls to the ropes... and gets there, but Y2J pulls back. SWEET CHIN MUSIC TO JERICHO! 1, 2... 3!! Y2J ELIMINATED
JR: "How can you not believe in Shawn Michaels, King?" Spinebuster by HHH gets 2. A head of steam from Shawn just gets him backdropped to the steel. Michaels then tries a Pedigree on the steel (!) but gets catapulted through the plexiglass! King: Do you believe in Triple H now, JR?" Hunter implores Shawn to get up. King: "I think he's begging for forgiveness." JR: "He's already begged for forgiveness from an authority higher than Triple H."
Shawn gets the better of a slugfest but lowers his head for a facebreaker. Now HHH tries a Pedigree on the steel, but HBK catapults him to the chains, clotheslines him back in and goes up top... all the way to the top of a pod... elbow drop! Instead of covering he calls for Sweet Chin Music... it's blocked! Pedigree! H takes ages to cover, he's exhausted. 1... 2... he kicked out! Hunter tries again, but Shawn backdrops out! Sweet Chin Music! 1.. 2... 3!!!
Winner: Shawn Michaels (new champion, first reign)
The reaction is amazingly loud and there are huge streamers. JR: "I know it's been said before... but DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?" Fantastic celebrations.
Verdict: 8.5/10. Lots to weight up here. The finishing stretch was perhaps a bit longer than necessary and the elimination of RVD could have been handled better - I get he knackered himself from the frog splash, but surely Jericho should have eliminated him? Booker wound up with some unfair heat.
However, the positives far outweigh the negatives. They got the gimmick over brilliantly, RVD's use of the Chamber was especially good. Everyone had strong showings, especially Jericho and HHH for working through his throat injury.
Final Thought: Overall this was a stellar show, only Summerslam bettered it that year. Every title changing hands, Lesnar losing for the first time and the début of the Chamber made this a very news worthy show, but the match quality was also really solid across the board. Aside from the masses of filler between the tag title match and the Chamber this was thoroughly watchable. Thumbs way up in the air.
* The opening video hypes Lesnar vs Big Show & Bischoff's revolution (HLA, Stacy table dancing, Raw Roulette, Triple H being awarded the title), saying evolution happens rapidly as we see clips of old rivalries and champions (Hogan/Andre, Rock/Austin etc).
*Being in the Garden they're just using the fire-door entrance opposite the hard camera, but there's also a random pyro stage in the crowd where the regular entrance usually is (must have had to be careful sitting there). The cameras immediately pan up to the Elimination Chamber. Sunday Night Heat beforehand was hilarious - they zoned the hard cam in lower down so you couldn't see the it and commentary had to give vague descriptions, it was like an SNL sketch on 24 hour news channels. The crowd are late arriving due to poor weather.
Match 1: Six Man Tag Team Elimination Table Match - The Dudleys (Bubba Ray & Spike) & Jeff Hardy vs 3 Minute Warning (Rosey & Jamal) & Rico
This is the closest thing to a traditional Survivor Series match tonight. JR: "Do you feel like a little wood?" King: "HUH!?!" Jeff's in a shit tonne of fluorescent paint.
JR calls 3MW "the biggest team in the WWE". We see clips of Jamal (who'd later find fame as YOOOOMANGA) splashing Jeff & Spike through a table on Raw.
JR calls 3MW "the biggest team in the WWE". We see clips of Jamal (who'd later find fame as YOOOOMANGA) splashing Jeff & Spike through a table on Raw.
3MW bum rush the ring, but get sent outside. Bubba presses Spike onto them but they catch him, so Jeff does POETRY IN MOTION over the top. JR: "The New York Knicks have got no one that can jump like Jeff Hardy, I've seen them play" BURN! No tags - good. MSG: "WE WANT TABLES". King mentions the first ever tag table match was in MSG too. Nice step up Frankensteiner by Spike on Jamal. WAZZZUPPPP by the Dudleys, then Jeff & Bubba do a modified one on Rico, Jeff leg dropping him instead. Damn! Bubba: "GET THE TABLES!"
King: "You and I are sat at a table aren't we JR?" JR: "Yes we are... Let's not suggest that!" Bubba props up a table in the corner, but Rosey impressively overpowers everyone. He tries avalanching Spike through it but Spike moved & he breaks the table. It doesn't count - your opponent has to drive you through. He no sells and flubs catching Jeff from a cross body, so New York tells him "You fucked up!" Spike tries to Dudley Dog Rico through a table, but 3MW catch him & double alley-oop him through the table! Ouch. SPIKE ELIMINATED.
King: "He may have been eliminated from more than this match". 3MW both go up top, but both get crotched, Rosey with an impressive split legged moonsault bump selling it. Poetry in Motion to Rosey, who pulls Jeff's hair to stop them doing it to Jamal. Great spinning leg lariat by Rico as Rosey takes Jeff to the fire exit. Bubba counters an avalanche with the Bubba Bomb & goes to save Jeff. They lay Rosey on a table & Jeff climbs to the top of the fire exit. He shrugs his shoulders and SWANTON BOMBS ROSEY FROM THE EXIT THROUGH THE TABLE! ROSEY ELIMINATED.
MSG: "Holy shit!" Back in ring, Rico tries moonsaulting Bubba through a table but loses his balance. Bubba then back superplexes him but Jamal moved the table so Rico wasn't eliminated - nice, realistic save. Jeff hits the Whisper in the Wind on Jamal, and then BATTERS him with a table outside. He tries the barricade run but Jamal throws the table back at him. He sets another up and SUPERFLY SPLASHES Jeff from the top to the outside through the table! JEFF ELIMINATED.
Flip Flop 'n' Fly by Bubba to Rico, who lays him on a table. He climbs the ropes but is met by Jamal. Holy shit Jamal tries to Frankensteiner Bubba off the top but Bubba superbombs him through the table!!! JAMAL ELIMINATED.
Rico's calling for Rosey, who saves him from a Bubba Bomb, despite being eliminated. Jamal helps too. But wait... IT'S D-VON!! He's in camo gear. He cleans house on 3MW. 3D through the table on Rico!!!
Winner: Bubba Ray Dudley (sole survivor)
*Post match Bubba's all "Wait, aren't you a reverend now?", but they hug it out and celebrate.
Verdict: 8/10. Cracking opener. Lots of action and while some eliminations were abrupt they were all really cool, as was the Dudley Boyz reunion.
* Stacy Kiebler's in The World (formerly WWF New York). Test would be with her but she's sent him on a worldwide PR tour because he likes being surrounded by his Test-icles. I really don't miss PG-13 sometimes. She introduces Saliva, who perform the Survivor Series theme song. Filler.
Match 2: WWE Cruiserweight Championship - Jamie Noble (C) (w/Nidia) vs Billy Kidman
Tazz and Michael Cole mention Kidman's beaten Noble twice in non-title situations. Well, once they stop fumbling over their words, Jesus. Also, what the hell's with Cole's turtle neck and leather jacket combo? Did the Greek government appoint him finance minister?
Quick near falls from roll ups and a Frankensteiner by Kidman to start, but Noble cuts him off with a neckbreaker for 2. Cole says Noble's the longest reigning champion in the company at the moment. Kidman fights out of a surfboard only to get sent outside. Tazz: "Noble's got somthin' up his sleeves here. But he has no shirt on SO HE HAS NO SLEEVES!" Cheers. Suicide dive by Noble. Back inside his crossbody from the top gets dropkicked out of mid air. Ouch. Nice jumping reverse elbow and an ushigoroshi by Kidman gets 2. Falcon arrow by Noble gets the same as Tazz points out Noble's focus on the back.
Atomic facebuster by Kidman readies Noble for the Shooting Star Press, but Nidia pulls Jamie outside, so Billy crossbodies him out there. Slingshot legdrop back inside gets 2. Nidia holds his foot then slaps him right in front of the ref (DQ?), but Noble accidentally knocks her off the apron - BK bomb! 1, 2, no. Nice sequence with Kidman backsliding out of a tiger bomb, but Noble rolls through & still gets the tiger bomb! 1, 2... NO. Noble tries a superplex, but falls to a super facebuster DDT for 2 and a half. SADISTIC hangman DDT over the top buckle by Noble gets 2. Enzughiri by Kidman, who fights off both Nidia & Noble trying to stop him going up top... SHOOTING STAR PRESS! 1, 2, 3!
Winner: Billy Kidman (new champion, seventh reign)
Verdict: 7/10. Nice match, a bit rushed and the story of Noble working the back wasn't as big as Tazz made out, but there were some nice spots and Noble sold desperation well at the end.
* Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit watch from the back. Angle says if BILLY FREAKIN' KIDMAN can win they can too... so long as Benoit stays out of the team captain's way haha. Benoit goes mental but Angle says to cool it - they're amigos, no one can beat them. Benoit seems to appreciate this and offers a handshake but Kurt's offended: "Tag team partners don't shake hands! Tag team partners gotta hug." The look on Benoit's face says it all, while Angle looks like he's cuddling a kitten & saying "Let's get tough".
* It's the F-View camera! Victoria is talking to herself in the mirror asking who's the prettiest. Apparently the mirror said Trish Stratus! Victoria: "YOU'RE CRAZY!" She promptly breaks the mirror and beheads a cardboard cut out of Trish near by. Bitches be cray.
* We see a video package for the women's hardcore match showing how unhinged Victoria is, including a vicious unprotected chair shot to Trish. King had a great line: "You said it right, anything goes, I just hope it's the clothes!"
Atomic facebuster by Kidman readies Noble for the Shooting Star Press, but Nidia pulls Jamie outside, so Billy crossbodies him out there. Slingshot legdrop back inside gets 2. Nidia holds his foot then slaps him right in front of the ref (DQ?), but Noble accidentally knocks her off the apron - BK bomb! 1, 2, no. Nice sequence with Kidman backsliding out of a tiger bomb, but Noble rolls through & still gets the tiger bomb! 1, 2... NO. Noble tries a superplex, but falls to a super facebuster DDT for 2 and a half. SADISTIC hangman DDT over the top buckle by Noble gets 2. Enzughiri by Kidman, who fights off both Nidia & Noble trying to stop him going up top... SHOOTING STAR PRESS! 1, 2, 3!
Winner: Billy Kidman (new champion, seventh reign)
Verdict: 7/10. Nice match, a bit rushed and the story of Noble working the back wasn't as big as Tazz made out, but there were some nice spots and Noble sold desperation well at the end.
* Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit watch from the back. Angle says if BILLY FREAKIN' KIDMAN can win they can too... so long as Benoit stays out of the team captain's way haha. Benoit goes mental but Angle says to cool it - they're amigos, no one can beat them. Benoit seems to appreciate this and offers a handshake but Kurt's offended: "Tag team partners don't shake hands! Tag team partners gotta hug." The look on Benoit's face says it all, while Angle looks like he's cuddling a kitten & saying "Let's get tough".
* It's the F-View camera! Victoria is talking to herself in the mirror asking who's the prettiest. Apparently the mirror said Trish Stratus! Victoria: "YOU'RE CRAZY!" She promptly breaks the mirror and beheads a cardboard cut out of Trish near by. Bitches be cray.
* We see a video package for the women's hardcore match showing how unhinged Victoria is, including a vicious unprotected chair shot to Trish. King had a great line: "You said it right, anything goes, I just hope it's the clothes!"
Match 3: Hardcore match for the WWE Women's Championship - Trish Stratus (C) vs Victoria
There's trash cans full of weapons tied to each ring post.
Victoria Pearl Harbours Trish while she's taking her jacket off, choking and ragdolling her with it. She finds a broom. JR: "You gonna ride that broom or you gonna use it?" We get a knuckle lock style spot with the broom. Victoria gets the advantage, choking Trish all the way up to the top rope, only to be pulled off. Trish finds a can lid but Victoria whacks it into her face with the broom. Outside the ring she whips Trish into one of the trash cans! Slingshot legdrop back inside gets 2. King: "The last time Victoria got whistled at was right before a train hit her." Cover your ears Sforcina!
Victoria props a trash can in the corner, only for Trish to catapult her into it. Trish finds an ironing board, whipping Victoria into it then gets a front kick for 2. Singapore cane time! She's whippin' Victoria like a Government Mule! King: "Poor Government mule." JR: "Never get a break do they?" Victoria's got a busted nose & WHACKS Trish with a bin lid. She blocks an attempted Stratusphere in the corner, only to get hit with a lid as she pulls Trish up. Nice! Powerbomb by Victoria, who finds a mirror only to get chick kicked for 2. Trish gets caned looking for more weapons, then hits a "modified" (read: botched) bulldog for 2. Victoria escapes outside and blinds Trish with a fire extinguisher, then hits a snap suplex for the 3!!
Winner: Victoria (new champion, first reign)
Verdict: 6.5/10. Everything was fine until the botches near the end and the abrupt finish. Victoria said she couldn't find the weapon she wanted for the finish and had to improvise. This was still appreciably physical.
* Coach asks Bischoff backstage what to expect from the Elimination Chamber: "History and the future all in one night". He says he's outdone Smackdown GM Stephanie McMahon AND himself before Big Show interrupts, telling Bischoff he'll prove trading him away was a big mistake by winning the title.
* BRRRROCKK LESSSSNAAAAARRR is warming up in the back with taped ribs. His agent Paul Heyman is very nervous, clutching Lesnar's title. He says nothing's been the same since Hell in the Cell but to put that behind them - they're in the Garden. New York City! Heyman promises "my client" will walk out champion."BUT WHO'S SIDE IS HE ON!?"
* Video package for the WWE title match highlights the Hell in the Cell last month between Lesnar and Undertaker, and Show's path of rage twatting Taker, Rikishi, Matt Hardy, Rey Mysterio and twice putting Lesnar through tables. He also did his trademark "say how big I am real slowly" promo: "I'm seven... foot... tall... five... hundred... pounds". Heyman says Brock can't manhandle, suplex or F-5 the Big Show, and he's got a broken rib. We also see Brock BATTER Show on the go home Smackdown, opening a gash in his arm charging him into the steps and hitting a BRUTAL unprotected chairshot.
Match 4: WWE Championship Match - Brock Lesnar (C) (w/ Paul Heyman) vs Big Show
State of Show in his slacks. Lesnar got a good pop even though he's not officially face yet.
They go nose to nose and stalemate on lock ups. MSG: "LET'S GO LESNAR!" Show finally overpowers Brock with a HUGE beale, but then speared down. Show tries a chokeslam but Lesnar sidesteps and BACK SUPLEXES BIG SHOW! So Brock CAN suplex the Big Show. He then counters an assalanche into a GERMAN SUPLEX. Good lord. Show blocks the F-5 though, battering the injured ribs and accidentally sending Brock into the ref. Lesnar ducks a big boot and FRICKIN' BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEXES SHOW!!
Heyman throws in a chair and Cole reminds us Lesnar is still unbeaten. Another chokeslam blocked. Lesnar tries a chairshot but Show punches it away! He gets it the second time though, and HOLY SHIT LESNAR HOISTS SHOW UP... FOR THE F-5!!! A new ref is out. 1... 2... HEYMAN PULLED THE REF OUT! Lesnar's pissed and gives chase, but runs right into chairshots to the ribs from Show. Chokeslam to the chair! The original ref is back. 1.. 2.. 3!!!
Winner: Big Show (new champion, second reign)
Verdict: 6/10. Holy shit, that was over in a flash but what a showcase for what a BEAST Lesnar is. Very watchable even if nice spots like Show punching the chair away got glossed over. They'd do better next year.
* Heyman and Show immediately high tail it into a limo. Wise move.
* Video package for the tag team title match is basically just highlights of the Smackdown Six killing it every week and Angle & Benoit's dissention.
Match 5: Triple Threat Elimination Match for the WWE Tag Team Championships - Edge & Rey Mysterio (C) vs Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit vs Los Guerreros (Eddie & Chavo)
FFS we see "newly engaged" Al Wilson and Dawn Marie in the crowd. I forgot Edge's fans were called the Edge Army. Only two men allowed in at once but you can tag anyone.
The Guerreros stir the shit at the start only to sit things out, while Angle hugs Benoit again. Benoit & Rey start. Rey's slippery but eventually gets caught by MASSIVE chops. A hurricanrana and flapjack allow him to tag Edge for a double hip toss. Benoit tags Angle who suffers a huge BAAACK body drop, so he tags Chavo. Nice! A freshly tagged Rey springboard splashes him for 2. Big face first press by Chavo lets him tag Eddie, who batters Rey only for Mysterio to go around the world (well Eddie) for a head scissors. Holy shit that was smooth.
Big monkey flip to Eddie, so he tags Kurt. MSG: "LET'S GO ANGLE". Another head scissors by Rey, then Angle randomly hit the post shoulder first (pet hate) and messes up throwing Rey up to the top rope. Quick tags between Angle & Benoit isolate Mysterio, working over his neck. Nice arm drag to counter the Angle Slam, but then Kurt clotheslines Rey's socks off. Front chancery RESTHOLD. FOREVER. Rey eventually escapes, wheelbarrows Angle, somersaults out of an attempted German and gets a spin wheel kick. Nice! Angle tried tagging the Guerreros so they jump off the apron haha.
Tags to Edge & Benoit! Edge cleans house and shit cans Chavo. Rey and Eddie take each other out with a Frankensteiner to the outside. Spear... countered to a simultaneous ankle lock and crossface!! Rey saves with a seated senton, and corkscrew plancha's Angle & Chavo! Benoit with German suplexes to Edge, only for Eddie to sunset flip Benoit whilst he German's Edge! Cool spot for 2. More suplexes from Benoit, who goes up for the headbutt on Edge, but Eddie sneaks in with the froggy splash! Benoit headbutts Eddie!
Angle with the Angle Slam and ankle lock on Eddie. The ref tries to get them out. Meanwhile Benoit has the crossface on Edge, but Chavo hits him with the tag belt, then chucks it to Angle - so Benoit thinks Kurt did it! Rey dropkicks them into each other, then hits an ace baseball slide head scissors on Chavo. Spear by Edge to Benoit! 1... 2... 3! BENOIT & ANGLE ELIMINATED
Angle's pissed and Angle Slams Edge as Benoit suplexes Rey. They argue to the back and Eddie covers for 2, followed by a heelo for another 2. Tazz says the Guerreros were smart letting the others start as they've still fresh. Eddie & Chavo double team Edge with sneaky tactics and RESTHOLDS only to eat a double flapjack. Tag to Rey! HIGH springboard crossbody. He uses a wheelbarrow on Eddie to hurricanrana Chavo. Nice! Edge spears both Guerreros in the corner. They set Eddie up top, and Edge elevates Rey up through an alley oop so he can hurricanrana Eddie! 1... 2... Chavo saves it!
619 to Eddie! But Chavo whacks Rey with the belt when Rey tried the West Coast Pop. Edge then furiously beats on Chavo. Meanwhile Eddie lock in the Lasso from El Paso on Rey... and Rey taps!
Winners: Los Guerreros (new champions, first reign)
Verdict: 8.5/10. Nice touch that the Guerreros used the belts to eliminate both teams and win them. Really these guys could do no wrong at this time. Barring a couple of flubs and (tiny) death spots this was pure class.
* Chris "I went to Harvard don't you know?" Nowinski is out. JR says he needs a haircut! He chides New Yorkers for their "street smarts". That's not real intelligence - you can' buy it like the Yankees bought their World Series titles! CHEAP HEAT. NYC: "SHUT THE FUCK UP".
* OMG he's now interrupted by Matt Hardy Version ONE-AAAAH! Did you know: Matt keeps the room temperature at a toasty 75 degrees? And only drinks low fat chocolate milk? He says New Yorkers aren't stupid... they're losers! They're such losers "they're SUCKING THE MATTITUDE OUT OF ME... right now, I'm choking worse than the Knicks". CHEAP HEAT. JR: "I don't know about that." King: "Hard to do, isn't it?" They go back and forth over who's right, Matt pointing out losers in the crowd. King: "Who's he pointing at, Tazz?" Inevitably they decide New Yorkers are both and celebrate.
* Somebody called an ambulance to a big pop. Oh no wait... it's BIG POPPA PUMP SCOTT STEINER!!! Business just picked up. He suplexes the fuck out of both guys. Steiner: "Who da man!?" He shit cans Nowinski ("Ha!") then presses Matt onto him. PUSH UPS. He dedicates this to all his freaks in New York City. "Big Poppa Pump is your hook up. Holla if ya hear me!"
* The Chamber is lowering. JR: "The brutality of Hell in the Cell, the unpredictability of War Games, the tradition of the Survivor Series and the importance of the World Title."
* Terri's chasing Shawn Michaels in the back, asking why he believes he can win. Shawn's adorable here. "Why do I believe? Little lady, are you kiddin' me?"... but before we get an answer we get an important RNN injury update from Randy Orton! Oh yes. If they wanted to keep Bo Dallas relevant during his injury they should have given him this gimmick. Orton thanks the sexy flight attendant for that extra pillow for his injured shoulder, giving a cheesy wink! He pleads for more get well emails.
* Video package for the Chamber match, showing its construction before breaking into Saliva's song again! HBK's comeback from Summerslam is highlighted in particular.
* Coach is with Triple H and Ric Flair backstage. H says he was awarded the title because he's the best and has beaten everyone to prove it, but it's not good enough so now he's facing five of the best ever in the Chamber. He'll still be champ at the end because he's that damn good!
* Bischoff comes out into the fully descended Chamber to explain the rules: four men are confined to internal pods, locked behind "bullet-proof plexiglass" (we'll see...), while the other two start the match. A pod opens every five minutes. Elimination is by pin fall or submission.
Main Event: Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Championship: Triple H (C) vs Rob Van Dam vs Shawn Michaels vs Chris Jericho vs Booker T vs Kane
Jesus that was a load of filler! Continuing the "Survivor Series: brought to you by Saliva" theme of the evening, they play Y2J to the ring live from The World (the Dudleys also had a Saliva song as their theme, they're all over this show). JR mentions every championship match tonight has resulted in a title change - not a good omen for HHH. Both he & King don't know what to expect and neither do the men in the Chamber. They also get over that Bischoff created this match to top Stephanie and last month's Hell in the Cell.
RVD and Triple H start. Van Dam controls with kicks as NYC chants his name. Facebreaker by Hunter, who goes for a Pedigree but gets backdropped over the top to the steel floor! Ouch. RVD keeps sending him into the Chamber door, nearly breaking it open as it's only locked with a tiny latch haha. Rob does his shoulder routine then monkey flips H on the steel. God damn! Rolling Thunder from the ring to the steel on Triple H! He then tells Jericho to fuck himself and climbs up his pod! Y2J's not amused and pulls his leg through the chain roof into his pod. Van Dam fights out, and hits a heelo from the top on HHH to the steel!! The countdown is on for the next entrant...
...it's Jericho! But he runs right into a kick from RVD and gets sent to the steel. He goes up top for a crossbody... Jericho ducks but HOLY SHIT Van Dam hangs on to the chain wall and crossbodies Jericho off the wall!!! Spider-Rob! The heels then start double teaming RVD, with a knee and senton combo getting 2. King points out since it's not a one fall match no one's gonna save people from falls. Y2J: "C'MON BABAY!" The heels keep whipping RVD into the chain walls. Y2J: "C'mon you sunnofabitch I'm the King of the World!" Hebner: "C'mon dammit!" Van Dam comes back, flipping out of a corner double team and kicking Jericho. JR: "I'll be surprised if Jericho has any teeth left when this one's over." The count's on again...
Booker T is out next. He cleans house with kicks and clotheslines. SPIN-A-ROON-I! After a nice evasive exchange he trades kicks with Van Dam for near falls. JR: "Van Dam... he's like trying to pour smoke through a keyhole." Scissors kick to Triple H! Jericho takes out Book, only to be taken out by RVD. Van Dam climbs... oh God all the way to the top of the pod! "Yano... To... Ru!" Wait that's not right...
Oh no that's it - "Rob... Van... Dam!" FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH FROM THE POD TO HHH!!! That killed RVD's knee and crushed HHH's throat. Booker missle dropkicks Van Dam from the top... and that gets 3! RVD ELIMINATED
That was a bit lame, and got Booker some boos. JR: "Van Dam literally took himself out of the competition with that Five Star Frog Splash." King: "He should have never gone that high." Story of his career... Booker tries covering Hunter too, but only gets 2 because the ref was getting Van Dam out of the Chamber. Y2J bulldogs Booker and goes for the Lionsault, but Book rolls away and hits a wicked whiplash spinebuster, slowly covering for 2 as the count is on again...
THAT'S GOTTA BE KANE! JR: "Now he's gotta beat on three men." *whit-woo* He sends Jericho to the steel and snake eyes him into the chains. He then throws Jericho into a pod and THE PLEXIGLASS BREAKS!! That had the crowd in awe, you could see Kane grinning at how well that went (SEND FOR THE MAN!). Booker escapes a powerslam only for Jericho to low blow him through the ropes. Chokeslam to Booker! Lionsault by Y2J. 1.. 2.. 3! BOOKER T ELIMINATED
JR: "This is one of those situations where careers are gonna be changed - I hope they're not shortened! But they're gonna be changed after tonight." Kane Flair-presses Hunter off the top. Jericho escapes a chokeslam with a low blow and second rope dropkick for 2 as a huge HBK chant erupts. The count is on, we know who's next. JR: "His second match in four years".
HBK is out! King: "He's hitting everything in sight". Backdrop to Y2J only to be clotheslined by Kane. Flying forearm by Shawn. Smark in the crowd: "You suck Shawn!" Kane flips him inside out with a whip to the corner... and chokeslams him. And Jericho. And Triple H! Throat slash! He goes to Tombstone H, but Hunter slides out & pushes him into Sweet Chin Music! Kane sits up! Pedigree! King: "He won't sit up from this." Jericho then gets a MASSIVE LIONSAULT three quarters across the ring for 3! KANE ELIMINATED
THAT'S a monster elimination. Y2J clotheslines HBK out to the steel to a nasty bump, and the heels then double team him and bust him open. H grinds him into the chains. Y2J: "Grate his head like a cheese grater!" Shawn fights back, clotheslining Triple H back in the ring. He tries to piledrive Jericho on the steel (are you MENTAL!) but Jericho backdrops out of it. JR: "Sometimes I think concrete would be nicer." Flying forearm to Hunter in the ring. Nip up! But Jericho comes in and bulldogs him. Lionsault! 1... 2... NO! JR: "Shawn Michaels is still a believer!"
Beautiful moonsault by Shawn for a near fall. He puts Jericho in the Walls of Jericho! But HHH DDTs him off. Jericho covers but H pulls him off because he wants to eliminate Shawn. Y2J: "We're gonna kick his ass!" The shoving match eventually becomes a fight. Clothesline by HHH (that Jericho was blatantly meant to duck) then a facebreaker for 2. Pedigree... countered to the Walls! HHH is in agony. He crawls to the ropes... and gets there, but Y2J pulls back. SWEET CHIN MUSIC TO JERICHO! 1, 2... 3!! Y2J ELIMINATED
JR: "How can you not believe in Shawn Michaels, King?" Spinebuster by HHH gets 2. A head of steam from Shawn just gets him backdropped to the steel. Michaels then tries a Pedigree on the steel (!) but gets catapulted through the plexiglass! King: Do you believe in Triple H now, JR?" Hunter implores Shawn to get up. King: "I think he's begging for forgiveness." JR: "He's already begged for forgiveness from an authority higher than Triple H."
Shawn gets the better of a slugfest but lowers his head for a facebreaker. Now HHH tries a Pedigree on the steel, but HBK catapults him to the chains, clotheslines him back in and goes up top... all the way to the top of a pod... elbow drop! Instead of covering he calls for Sweet Chin Music... it's blocked! Pedigree! H takes ages to cover, he's exhausted. 1... 2... he kicked out! Hunter tries again, but Shawn backdrops out! Sweet Chin Music! 1.. 2... 3!!!
Winner: Shawn Michaels (new champion, first reign)
The reaction is amazingly loud and there are huge streamers. JR: "I know it's been said before... but DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?" Fantastic celebrations.
Verdict: 8.5/10. Lots to weight up here. The finishing stretch was perhaps a bit longer than necessary and the elimination of RVD could have been handled better - I get he knackered himself from the frog splash, but surely Jericho should have eliminated him? Booker wound up with some unfair heat.
However, the positives far outweigh the negatives. They got the gimmick over brilliantly, RVD's use of the Chamber was especially good. Everyone had strong showings, especially Jericho and HHH for working through his throat injury.
Final Thought: Overall this was a stellar show, only Summerslam bettered it that year. Every title changing hands, Lesnar losing for the first time and the début of the Chamber made this a very news worthy show, but the match quality was also really solid across the board. Aside from the masses of filler between the tag title match and the Chamber this was thoroughly watchable. Thumbs way up in the air.
Final Verdict: STICK
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