My Favourite Albums of 2014: Part 2

OK then, onwards we go. Unless you missed the first part, in which case you can catch up here.

Before getting my albums countdown back under way, I thought I'd give a brief mention of some of the tracks I've enjoyed, aside from what I'm mentioning in my albums countdown of course.

Honourable Mentions (Tracks)

• SBTRKT feat. Ezra Koenig- "New Dorp. New York": Pure badassery on display here, that visceral throb in the beat sounds like the heartbeat of a demon. Meanwhile Vampire Weekend's Koenig partakes in some bewitching word play ("Gargoyles gargling oil", "Flags Flapping in Manhattan") and some feverish MJ style vocals that leave you expecting a "Ch'mon-AH" at the end ("MAH girl got a lim-o-zeeen!").

• Johnny Marr - "Easy Money"/"Dynamo": I'm surprised that it's taken Johnny so long to released a disco stomper like "Easy Money" considering he named his son after Nile Rodgers. It perhaps caught those expecting him to just retread ground he covered with The Smiths by surprise (we have Morrissey to do that for us anyway) but for the rest of us it was one of the most instantly likeable songs of the year. The soaring guitars of "Dynamo" also make it the most beautiful tribute I've heard to such a boring building.

• Flying Lotus feat. Kendrick Lamar - "Never Catch Me": FlyLo's Thom Yorke style jazz infusion take on hip hop never really clicked with me, but I was delighted that Kendrick came and filled that missing piece of the puzzle on this track, keeping things slick when they could have meandered off. It's a shame his album didn't make it out this year, the pretty swish Isley Brothers rework "i" being the only glimpse we got.

• Little Dragon - "Paris": Again, Little Dragon still feel like there's one piece of the puzzle they need to find before I fall unreservedly in love with them, but singer Yukimi Nagano is definitely a keeper. This year's album Nabuma Rubberland was littered with gems including this one. Keys and synths feel like raindrops on a window, and Yukimi's delivery shines as always ("There's an angel knocking on my window; Tryna tell me where to go next").

• Future Islands - "Seasons (Waiting On You)": Unlike most of the internet I'm not totally enamoured with Future Islands, but this song is undoubtedly ace. Heartfelt with excellent synth and bass work that drives all the way through to the chorus. Still doesn't excuse Samuel T Herring's dodgy crab dancing. I just don't buy him as the second coming of David Byrne, sorry.

Now back to my favourite albums...

5. Alvvays - Alvvays

Big, fuzzy indie pop has long been a love of mine, as have bands who play with a happy, pleasant sound masking slightly less happy subject matter. Alvvays (pronounced Always, the double v is to make them Google-able) not only tick all those boxes but completely fill them in from edge to edge in ink.

The production is spot on, with tonnes of echo from Molly Rankin's vocals and heaps of haze surrounding the instrumentation, as if you're hearing the band in a dream. The guitar work is very chirpy and never fails to leave me feeling like I'm floating on a cloud. The band themselves nearly put it best with the line "Floating through a dream; I never could make out the words you said."

Although that last part is not quite true. There's lots of terrific thoughts on highly relate-able anxieties; longing to make a good first impression in "Adult Diversion" ("If I should fall act as though it never happened") and living in mutual denial with someone you clearly love in "The Agency Group" ("When you whisper you don't think of my that way; When I mention you don't mean that much to me") being two prime examples.

The biggest triumph here though is feel good hit of the summer "Archie, Marry Me", a satire on the pressure young couples feel to get married ("They're talking about us living in sin") - but only if it's a big wedding they can't afford. Even so, there are moments that perfectly captures that feeling of devotion and joy of being with that special someone, and the music behind it is just as joyous. The bit in the second verse where the guitar fuzz goes into overdrive and the bass line takes a walk is just magical, and the air-punching enthusiasm of the "HEY HEY"s of the chorus is inescapable.
The perfect reminder of everything I love about guitar pop. 

Download: "Archie, Marry Me", "Next Of Kin", "The Agency Group"

4. Sharon Van Etten - Here We Are

Cathartic and beautiful, this record sees Sharon open up and give one of the most emotionally honest records you'll come across. The assurance and growth she shows here is remarkable.

Sure, it's another break up record in a world full of them, but what Sharon brings to the table her is one of the most incredible voices in music today. I'm paraphrasing here, but I remember reading someone explain how people loved Johnny Cash because when he sang, you believed him. For me, that is the best way to describe what Sharon's voice is like: when you hear her, you believe and feel for her. When she pleads "I NEED you to be afraid of nothing" on the opener, her voice almost cracking on "NEED", you really feel how much she needs it. Her heartache becomes your heartache, and this is certainly a heartbreaking record.

There is a will to do better - "Tell me if there's something I can change; Recall I know what a sanctuary is" (the utterly captivating "I Love You But I'm Lost"), "I will meet you on your street; I won't let you down" (the delightful "Nothing Will Change"), but even in moments of bliss like the tender "Our Love" (the subject of the best remix of the year from The Juan Mclean), there is an uncertainty ("Still don't know what I have found").

Two tracks key to the tone of the album are the dramatic "Your Love Is Killing Me" and the defeatist yet anthemic "Every Time The Sun Comes Up".
The former is a tremendous showcase for Sharon's voice, soaring over huge keys and drums and starkly describing how desperately she wants to avoid her pain ("Burn my skin so I can't feel you; Stab my eyes so I can't see you").
The latter has such a beautiful chorus, and again fantastic drum work, as it gives a very minimal account of how Sharon feels she can do no right, including the frank line "I washed your dishes but I shit in your bathroom". It felt a clunker at first but I think I see where she's coming from now, as if she's saying "No matter what good I can do you, I will always be a burden".
Musically, though, she is the exact opposite of a burden and a truly remarkable artist.

Download: "Your Love Is Killing Me", "Nothing Will Change", "Every Time The Sun Comes Up"

3. The War On Drugs - Lost In The Dream

Few album titles offer a more fitting description of the music featured than what The War On Drugs decided to christen their third album, which by all accounts appears to be a breakthough success. There's an ethereal, other worldliness to Lost In The Dream that makes it feel like a journey of understanding, meandering through towards clarity, losing and gaining and your grip on reality. Oh, and it's also one of the best rock records of the year.

Opener "Under The Pressure" gives a clear indication of what's to come. This is a record where space and build are crucial in helping you form a connection to the world you're being sent to, and over its near 9 minute run time this opening salvo makes a strong impression. Nearly a third of its run time is taken up by drip feeding the closing moments of the song, making it feel like it's fading into the fog. Plenty of its best devices reoccur throughout the album.

The drum loops that kick things off later form the heartbeat of "Disappearing" and the show stopping "An Ocean Between The Waves", which also builds anticipation and intensity masterfully. Closing track "In Reverse"uses a similar approach, with the initial guitar parts feeling like the ripples from a stone being skipped across the water, before the brilliant chorus begins to drive the song home ("And I don't mind you disappearing; Because I know you can be found").
Also present throughout the album is some really sweet use of the tenor saxophone, especially on the beautiful "Eyes To The Wind" ("I'm just a bit run down here at the moment; Let me think about it babe") and the gentle anguish of "Suffering".

What's really impressive about this record is the sequencing and how the sparser moments are used to heighten the impact of its biggest, most driven rock songs. "Red Eyes" is one of the best rock singles of the year and feels like a real thunderbolt coming after "Under The Pressure" fades away. Meanwhile "The Haunting Idle" is basically just a three minute intro to the magnificent "Burning", a synth rock monster that owes a great deal to Born In The U.S.A. era Springsteen. The sugar rush of the second verse bringing the backing vocals in is just sublime ("WHEN YOU RELEASE ME FROM YOUR HEART AGAIN! WOO!"), and puts me in mind of Bruce & Steve getting into it. On the flip side, the stunning title track puts me in mind of modern day Bruce and is one of the most touching moments on the record.
Leaps and bounds ahead of the game, The War On Drugs deserve the success this album has brought.

Download: "Red Eyes", "An Ocean In Between The Waves", "Lost In The Dream"

2. Broken Records - Weights And Pulleys

Broken Records and I go way back. Getting championed by Planet Sound's John Earls is always a good way of getting my attention. In fact I remember they were so thrilled at making PS's Top Singles of the year list in 2008 that they posted a big spoiler, putting the full list up before PS themselves had revealed it, which I promptly pointed out to them on Myspace (remember that?). More recently my Mum somehow wound up posting on their Facebook page about how there was a microwave on offer in Asda, thinking she was talking to me. God, parents eh?

Anyway long story short I love Broken Records. I've always felt they are Britain's answer to Arcade Fire, and the four year(!) wait for a follow up to Let Me Come Home has felt like an eternity. Thankfully they're back to fill that void they left in my life, with a record of great variety, verve and vigour.

You'd think things had peaked early on with the blistering "Winterless Son", with every iota of the band's vast instrumentation firing ahead at full force, the impact being even greater for following opener "Ditty (We Weren't Ready)" with its unique percussion and ace weepy guitars. "Toska" then follows things with the keys and strings dominating proceedings. This is what's great about having such a strong line up of musicians, it gives you so many options to go in so many different directions. All of which are tied together by singer Jamie Sutherland's brilliant delivery - I've always admired singers who can keep their native accent in their voice and Jamie is no different, instantly making all those Scottish artists who sing in a yanky twang sound like knobs.

We then get guitars ringing out like sirens on "So Long, So Late", with added "Cuyhaoga" references ("Well the river it did not burn, but these towns are still dead and gone") and the delightful title track with its infectious hand claps and "I'm On Fire" style "Woah-oh-oah"s. Proceedings then mostly flip between break neck rockers like "Let's Call It A Betrayal" and the fantastic "I Won't Leave You In The Dark" (with an absolutely glorious performance from the horns section at the closing sequence, including a huge feel-good sax break worthy of the Clemons family name) and gentler missives like "You'll Be Lonely In A Little While", but the energy levels and passion never drop whatsoever right to the very end of closing ballad "All Else Can Just Wait".
Well, maybe not all else. I don't want to wait another four years for the next one please guys! Oh, and thank you for the Christmas single.

Download: "Winterless Son", "Toska", "I Won't Leave You In The Dark"

1. Rosanne Cash - The River & The Thread

Despite what the Nashville episode of Foo Fighters' "Sonic Highways" will have you believe, there's fucking loads of great country music at the moment. I've already mentioned Sturgill Simpson and Lydia Loveless, but this year also saw the excellent Colfax by The Delines, First Aid Kit's major label debut Stay Gold, Platinum by Miranda Lambert, Tarpaper Sky by Rodney Cromwell and Terms Of My Surrender by John Hiatt to mention but a few.

But beyond question the cream of the crop came from a true member of country music royalty. For me personally this was the most richly rewarding listening experience of the year. I can't claim to be an expert in Rosanne's work. The only other album of hers I own being previous effort The List, but I get the sense listening to this record that this is the most secure she's been in her identity in a long while, and no doubt this exploration of her southern roots is the main driving force behind that.

The travels and travails of the South have inspired a vivid picture of Memphis, Mississippi and Florence and living with the legacy of her roots, but still maintains that unquantifiable warmth that comes from being home. No where is this warmth more evident that on the gorgeous "Etta's Tune", a touching tribute to her father's former bassist Marshall Grant and his wife Etta. "What's the temperature, darling?" Cash coos, as she recounts a tale of devotion ("I travelled for a million mile while you were standing still") and an apparent acceptance of the end ("Don't stare into the past; There was nothing we could change or fix, it was never going to last").

There's an inescapable draw that comes from home, which comes to the fore of the zippy "Modern Blue" - not even Paris or Barcelona can overturn the pull of your roots. Fruitless attempts to avoid the call of home crop up again on the revelatory "A Feather's Not A Bird", as Rosanne bemoans "I took the long way home just to wind up in your arms" with expert delivery. Seriously, she can show more strength and depth of character in one line or phrase than other artist do in entire songs.

"A Feather's Not A Bird" is also a shining example of the other central theme of the album; reaffirming identity. This carries over to the cheery "50,000 Watts" ("We'll be who we are, and not who we were") as well as the poetic "World Of Strange Design", featuring a lovely nod to her father ("Now I'm a jewel in the shade of his weeping willow tree"). The best exploration of this theme, though is in Civil War tale "When The Master Calls The Roll", as Cash uses the story of the war derailing the courtship of two young lovers to express the conflict of love of her home and shame over the war, with some real heart-twinging lines ("I will never travel back to her; But not for lack of trying").
A true masterpiece that stands shoulder to shoulder with her father's best for sure.

Download: "A Feather's Not A Bird", "Etta's Tune", "When The Master Calls The Roll"

Are you still here? Oh good, well you've lasted the whole way, yay! Just remains to say have a wonderful Christmas and all the best for New Year.

My Favourite Albums of 2014: Part 1

2014 has been full of musical memories for me. From Bruce Springsteen in an Australian winery to Jason Isbell at Gorilla getting the loudest most appreciative reception I've ever heard at a club sized gig. From breaking the 900 mark on my 1001 albums challenge to volunteering at the Hooked On Music results event.
I adore music and I'm always on the lookout for something new to discover, so I always love "End of Year List" season. Especially now that my favourite music magazine The Fly has closed down, I really appreciate excellent end of year round ups like those from Piccadilly Records and American Songwriter that help me catch up on anything interesting that's previously escaped my attention.

Of course, as usual, I thought I'd stick my oar in and mention the music I enjoyed over the past twelve months. These are the albums that I don't necessarily feel are the best ten records of the year, just the ones I've gained the most personal enjoyment out of. As always, I'll split this in two, I'll talk about my favourite five in my next entry. Before I kick things off, here are some albums that didn't quite make the cut but I couldn't go without mentioning.

Honourable Mentions

• Hiss Golden Messenger - Lateness Of Dancers: Wonderfully atmospheric folk from North Carolina's MC Taylor and Scott Hirsch. A record of marvellous warmth and immersion, it comes out of the gates with its best song, "Lucia", a beautifully arranged song with echoes of Dylan's "Tangled Up In Blue" in its chorus.

• The Juan McLean - In A Dream: Funky, punky dance from the DFA veteran, now featuring LCD Soundsystem alumnus Nancy Whang in a permanent role. New Order meets Italo-disco. 

• Royal Blood - Royal Blood: The fastest selling rock debut in years, Royal Blood have fired an important shot in rock's attempt to reclaim Top 40 radio after the era of "landfill indie". The two piece from Brighton are raucous and riff heavy, filled with the spirit of Zeppelin and louder than what you think two people would be capable of. "Come On Over" and "Little Monster" are two of the stand out singles of the year.

• Sturgill Simpson - Metamodern Sounds In Country Music: Only of the most imaginative voices in country I've heard in a long time. Simpson's voice sounds like Willie Nelson and Glen Campbell somehow had a secret love child, singing about attempting to come out of his drug fuelled haze with something wonderful like "Turtles All The Way Down" and "Long White Line".

• Bruce Springsteen - High Hopes/American Beauty

So Bruce had a busy year. High Hopes was really a place for previously homeless songs to go, so it didn't quite have the coherence of some of his other albums (and no, Rolling Stone, it certainly wasn't the second best album released all year!) but this will always remind me of Australia. Plus there were still some real gems here.
The Celtic feel to "This Is Your Sword" reminiscent of previous album Wrecking Ball, the knock-about cheer of "Frankie Fell In Love" (who can resist a song that talks of "Einstein and Shakespeare, sittin' having a beer"?) and the sparse, touching version of Suicide's "Dream Baby Dream" are all excellent.  But head and shoulders above everything is the beautiful "Hunter Of Invisible Game", a brilliant post-apocalyptic ballad that really capture that feeling of chasing something intangible, hoping things turn your way.

The follow up EP American Beauty will also hold a dear place in my heart as my first ever purchase at a Record Store Day, the quietly seething "Hey Blue Eyes" being the highlight.

OK then, on with the countdown!

10. Interpol - El Pintor

The past few years have been frustrating for an Interpol fan. 2010's eponymous album chased its own tail far too much and drove uber-cool bassist Carlos D away in boredom. Such behaviour only encouraged bollocks opinions like "Murgh they haven't done anything good since Turn On The Bright Lights" from people who seem to forget that some of their best singles came from Antics.

In fact, El Pintor (notice the anagram) puts this listener immediately in mind of Antics with its pace and how most songs are arranged to sound like singles.

It's hard to imagine a better statement of intent for your comeback than lead single and album opener "All The Rage Back Home", sounding livelier than anything from their previous album. Equally propulsive is the sparky "Anywhere", while even relatively gentler songs like "My Desire" culminate in some great guitar work. Singer Paul Banks took over bass duties when Carlos left, and he does a great job of keeping the flow of the song going without overshadowing the focal guitar play, such as on the aforementioned "My Desire" and the terrific "Everything Is Wrong". Another song that makes the future of the band seem very promising is "Tidal Wave", a song that rumbles along before washing over you like its namesake.

After years of little or poor direction, it seems like Interpol have got their shit back together, which is a good thing for all of us.

Download: "All The Rage Back Home", "Everything Is Wrong", "Tidal Wave"

9. Lydia Loveless - Somewhere Else

It's a shame Lydia Loveless has seemed to escape most people's attention on their end of year lists. I know there are lots of strong female acts in country these days but Lydia does more than enough to warrant attention, with her use of louder arrangements on her songs infusing a punk edge to her sound kind of like how Frank Turner has somehow managed to apply punk principles to folk.

Her fiery voice is reminiscent of a young Lucinda Williams or Natalie Maines, and further enhances the (already strong) character of her songs. She knows when to sing with a sense of being wronged (the title track) and coming to terms with past mistakes such as on  "Chris Issak", which contains the bluntly confessional line "When I was seventeen I'd follow you around with my head jammed way up your ass".

The more carnal her subject matter, the more she seems to excel. "To Love Somebody" ("Oh honey, let me melt in your mouth tonight"), "Wine Lips" ("Go tell your momma that my French has finally improved") all talk of desire to varying degree of subtlety, only for the excellent singalong "Head" to dispose of subtlety or pretence entirely. Whatever the subject there's a rawness to her delivery and wording that is truly refreshing, and this is reflected most in the heartbreaking "Everything's Gone" ("Well, I swore I’d never be this bitter again; But some years have passed... I thought I'd be OK without a home if I just had grace") and the title track ("I waved the flag for the home team too long; Then again, things ain’t looking too good on the other side").
A standout voice in country music today.

Download: "Wine Lips", "Head", "Somewhere Else"

8. Elbow - The Take Off And Landing Of Everything

Elbow have long been favourites of mine. Since breakthrough album The Seldom Seen Kid the band have worked hard to tread the fine line required not to just ape "One Day Like This", and with perhaps the exception of "New York Morning" they succeed in droves here.

Taking inspiration stylistically from first album Asleep In The Back, there's a more experimental feel to proceedings here. Looking backwards to move forwards doesn't always yield worthy results, but this approach has certainly worked here. In the nostalgic "My Sad Captains" the band have unearthed another moment that makes you cherish those amongst you, while the skittish "Charge" opens up a whole new direction for the band. The scratchy, minimal guitars work in tandem with Guy Garvey's bitter lyrics ("And Glory be, these fuckers are ignoring me") bemoaning his advancing years ("I'm from another century") and living in fear of what he could become ("I am the die hard with an empty dance card propping up a young bar").

Indeed there is a lot of soul searching on this record, most likely prompted by Guy coming out of a long term relationship. The lyrics are littered with talk of past love: "While three chambers of my heart beat true and strong with love for another; The fourth is yours forever" ("This Blue World"), "She and I won't find another me and her" ("Honey Sun"). It is the title track that makes the most of this heartache though. The horns at the start feel like a call to take flight, and the vocal harmonies as the song reaches its climax are an utter delight, as the lyrics in between seem to indicate there's an acceptance from both parties that it's time to move on ("Patiently listen as dull reminiscences fall from my jaw in a jumble again", "Leaving your lips as we took to the sky").
More, please.

Download: "Charge", "My Sad Captains", "The Take Off And Landing Of Everything"

7. Bob Mould - Beauty & Ruin

This is the crown jewel of what's been a great year for mega-indie label Merge (which also released ace albums by Hiss Golden Messenger and Ex-Hex amongst others) as former Sugar and Husker Du singer Bob Mould delivers a blistering pop rocker.

A man with Mould's legacy might be tempted to feel burdened or beholden by his previous work, but certainly neither of these appear to be the case here. The opening slow burning dirge of "Low Season" morphs into the belting "Little Glass Pill" in a terrific opening sequence. It may or may not be a Matrix analogy, but either way its conclusion should prepare you to take a trip down the rabbit hole Alice, and expect it to be at full throttle too.

The break neck "Kid With The Crooked Face" and "Hey, Mr. Grey" sees him fly through what he made famous with Husker Du without any inhibition, while taking a look at his most famous work with Sugar and deciding "You know what? I can top that" has lead to arguably the year's best single in "I Don't Know You Anymore". It's exactly what he does best - thoroughly irresistible, tremendously catchy and a total sugar rush with a bittersweet reflective edge to it. That reflective outlook also informs other standout moments on the album such as the masterful "The War" and the inspired "Fire In The City" (complete with "Everlong" style elongated riffs at the final bridge).
An utter delight.

Download: "I Don't Know You Any More", "The War", "Fire In The City"

6. Ryan Adams - Ryan Adams

Usually it really bugs me when an artist releases an eponymous album midway through their careers, but in this case it feels pretty apt, as if Ryan has opened up and gone through a rejuvenation. Much like Jenny Lewis has done on The Voyager (which he produced, and is another treat), Adams seems to have taken stock and taken a concise attitude in how to move forward with their sound.

It was certainly enough to catch my attention and bring me to this album. I've never really felt like I've been on Ryan's wavelength but hearing "Gimme Something Good" on the radio this summer had my ears burning. I didn't believe it was him at first, it was so loose and immediately gratifying, with the highly sonorous riffs coming out of his guitar feeling like a beacon of light  cutting through the fog of his other material.

Much of the formula of "Gimme Something Good" is carried over to the album itself. The big guitar sound which comes from drawing something more considered and emotive out of devices considered out of fashion by some is littered everywhere (and is also well illustrated in his version of Foreigner's "I Want To Know What Love Is"). They ring out like alarms on "Stay With Me", pulse with absolute menace on "I Just Might" and jangle resignedly on "Tired Of Giving Up". Although having said that, acoustic track "My Wrecking Ball" is also one of the album's biggest delights.
The lyrics are pared down to bare essentials, "Am I Safe" ("Every day my heart beats like a stone; Carries me away into the undertow") and "Trouble" ("Seven years bad luck is better than none") are perhaps the best at utilising immediacy to betray their subject's paranoia.

I think in terms of music this could be my "gateway drug" in appreciating Adams' work. An honest and rewarding listen.

Download: "Trouble", "My Wrecking Ball", "Feels Like Fire"

Keep your eyes peeled for part two soon!

1001 Albums Update - 911 And Counting!

Right then people, things are getting serious now! I'm now down to double figures as far as how many albums I have left goes, which is actually pretty scary. It probably means my updates will be less frequent & in depth, as many of the albums I have left are ones I've been unable to find on streaming services.

In addition to making my way through these albums (mostly from the 80s, as I'm sure you'll be able to tell!), I've also been making my way to a few gigs recently. Firstly I saw The War On Drugs at The Ritz and they were simply incredible. They played a well thought out set that kept the crowd dancing, littered with highlights from this year's Lost In The Dream album (more on that soon)

Then there was the glorious Sharon Van Etten at Manchester Cathedral. The venue was magnificent and such a great match for Sharon's voice. I was just in awe of delivery and looking into her eyes you could see how much the songs in her set meant to her.

Right, onto what I heard this time around.

• Steve Winward - Arc Of A Diver: Pretty interesting listen. His voice was quite like Peter Gabriel, and then by the time "Spanish Dancer" rolled around things were sounding like Kraftwerk.

• The Go Gos - Beauty And The Beat: Really zesty, punky stuff here. Lots of choppy guitars and cool dancey numbers like "Our Lips Are Sealed", "Lust To Love" and "We Got The Beat".

• Motorhead - No Sleep 'Til Hammersmith 

Just as intense as you'd expect, this live album is as good a gateway into Motorhead's stuff as you'll find (if you can tell the songs apart that is). "The Hammer", "Overkill" and "Over The Top" are all thunderous. And of course "Ace Of Spades" is here. Plus listening to this album instead of going to a Motorhead show has the added benefit of not having to look at Lemmy's warts.

• The Human League - Dare!

Here's something to set your 80's klaxons off! Everybody and their dog knows what a classic singalong "Don't You Want Me" is, but there's so much more quality on offer here. While highly camp, the synths have aged remarkably well, penultimate track "Love Action (I Believe in Love)" is a corker and opener "The Things That Dreams Are Made Of" maintains the "belt out the chorus at the top of your lungs" spirit of the album's most famous track. Thoroughly enjoyable.

• Bobby Womack - The Poet

It seemed like Bobby Womack was an underappreciated gem of soul music before Damon Albarn gave him some terrific direction in his later years. A great shame. Bobby really got into the a very disco feel with the very busy beats and chanting vocals of "Secrets" (Owes a tip of the cap to "The Secret Life of Arabia" by David Bowie too from the sounds of it), while the high class ballad "If You Think You're Lonely Now" has a great, slow, tender groove to it.

• ABBA - The Visitors 

It's funny how both of the ABBA albums on this list are rather lacking in their most famous songs. "One Of Us" is the only semi-recognisable track on here for me, and that's just because my Mum and Dad used to change the lyrics to "One of us has farted". Still, if you enjoy typical ABBA this will still be a rewarding listen with "Under Attack" and "The Day Before You Came" standing out.

• ABC - The Lexicon Of Love: It may have the erratic thrills of "The Look Of Love (Part One)" (seriously, the question-answer section of the vocals on that song is some top class cheese), but there was little else worthy of your attention here.

• The Birthday Party - Junkyard 

I've mentioned on numerous occasions what a fan of Nick Cave I am, so to hear him in his pre-Bad Seeds days was intriguing, if not exactly rewarding. The Birthday Party sounded like nothing more than noise merchants here, and Cave's lyrical imagery was very much pushed to the background. Bit disappointing really.

• Malcolm McLaren - Duck Rock: Malcolm was inspired to make this record by visits to Africa, which was certainly evident on the likes of "Double Dutch" and "Jive My Baby". Pretty good. Also as someone who grew up hearing lots of Eminem hearing "Buffalo Gals" is very surreal.

 

• Hanoi Rocks - Back To Mystery City: Another good old high octane listen, a bit like The Saints in the way they utilise horns such as on "Malibu Beach Nightmare". "Ice Cream Summer" proved to be the real standout though.

• Cyndi Lauper - She's So Unusual: Another decade defining artist, "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" and "Time After Time" are synonymous with the rise of MTV and the change in how music connected with young people. Also check out "Money Changes Everything" and "I'll Kiss You".

• Meat Puppets - II: Anybody who adores Nirvana's MTV Unplugged album will be taken aback to find so much that's familiar here."Plateau", "Oh, Me" and "Lake Of Fire" all made appearances in Nirvana's set, and listening here makes it obvious why this record appealed to Cobain. Stark lyrics and sharp guitars abound.

• Run DMC - Run DMC: The Jason Nevins remix of "It's Like That" was practically inescapable during my childhood so to hear it in its original glory was really cool. It was the last song in a really good run mid-album with "Hollis Crew" and "Sucker MCs" preceding it.

• Cocteau Twins - Treasure, Heaven Or Las Vegas

I've had a few people tell me over the years that these guys might be to my tastes, so I was looking forward to hearing from them. Imagine my disappointment when I found I hate them vociferously! Their voices are nigh on unintelligible and persistent like rashes, sounding like a pair of birds competing to be heard or a set of meerkats calling for their mates. Their musical accompaniment is trying so hard to be like The Cure it might as well be screaming "WASN'T FASCINATION STREET AN AMAZING SONG!?!" and felt totally substandard. Blurgh.

• Tina Turner - Private Dancer 

Tina Turner is just a force of nature. I played "Show Some Respect" and I thought all the glass in my room was going to shatter. That song also had some ace Otis style "Gotta gotta"s too. There was a lot of Tina just cutting loose with other people's material, including an interesting take on David Bowie's "1984". The biggest highlight though? "WHAAAAAT'S LOOOOVE GOTTA DO! GOTTA DO WITH ITTT!"

• Minutemen - Double Nickels On The Dime 

Seemed like these guys were trying very hard to live up to there name. You'll struggle to find anything above two minutes here, I mean it was like they were trying to make a Ramones song look like a Christopher Nolan movie in comparison. There are still a few shouty, sparky gems including "Corona" which I swear was the Jackass theme tune. Also check out the cheeky "#1 Hit Song" and the Pavement-ish "Dr. Wu".

• Youssou N'Dour - Immigres: Such a cheery album, really welcome to hear. "Taaw" was lovely.

• A-Ha - Hunting High And Low: Fucking yes! Judge me all you want, but I'm just going to sit here and sing "Take On Me" and "The Sun Always Shines On TV" to myself.

• Kate Bush - Hounds Of Love, The Sensual World

Another pair I've been really heavily anticipating hearing. Unlike The Cocteau Twins, Kate didn't leave me disappointed. 

I get the feeling people don't talk enough about how good The Sensual World is. Again, there were a fair few Peter Gabriel like moments here, like "Love And Anger", in the way that the vocals would build up and the really aggressive riff in the chorus being counterbalanced by the choir. "Rocket's Tail" is quite similar, starting off  with very Celtic like vocals before a dirty great guitar riff cuts through the air and then the vocals got seriously mental near the climax, like Xena developed a stammer. Of course, in "This Woman's Work" it contained one of the stand out moments from Kate's whole career, proof that even without her artsy-leanings she could be utterly captivating.

Having said that, Hounds Of Love is definitely my favourite. That opening run of "Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God)", the title track and the pure joy of "The Big Sky" is seriously tough to beat. Although she inevitable does top it all with "Cloudbusting", which has fast become my favourite song of hers. Her voice is a pure delight, those strings leave me with such a blissful feeling, and the way the percussion drives things through on the choruses and echo the pitter-patter of rainfall to reflect the theme of the lyrics ("I wake up crying, You're making rain, And you're just in reach, When you and sleep escape me"). Categorically one of this country's essential artists.

• Anita Baker - Rapture: Heavenly voice, quasi-title track "Caught Up In The Rapture" is a delight, while "Sweet Love" is one of the all time classic ballads.

• Dolly Parton, Linda Ronstadt, Emmylou Harris - Trio 

Hard to escape the feeling these three were born to sing together. Anybody who's heard Emmylou's take on Dolly's "Coat Of Many Colours" could have probably predicted that. Every one of them can evoke such incredible feelings with their voices. Check out "To Know Him Is To Love Him" in particular.

• Various Artists - A Christmas Gift For You From Phil Spector

Well it is the right time of year for this, finally! This is essentially just Phil Spector gathering some of his hottest acts made famous by his "Wall of Sound" production like The Ronettes, The Crystals, Bob. B Soxx and The Blue Jeans and Darlene Love, and then making the greatest festive album in history. Everything on here is always popular when it comes to soundtracking Christmas ads. 

The Cyrstals give arguably the definitive rendition of standards like "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town" and "Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer". Likewise, hear The Ronettes sing "Frosty The Snowman" or "Sleigh Ride" and you'll be hard pressed to imagine anybody else singing them. But for me Darlene Love has the best run of tracks on the record: the swing and pomp "White Christmas", the terrific "Marshmallow World" and the show stopping "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)".

In addition, the following were also pretty enjoyable

• The The - Infected
• Alice Cooper - Billion Dollar Babies
• Minor Threat - Out Of Step
• Suzanne Vega - Suzanne Vega
• Nanci Griffith - The Last Of The True Believers
• Billy Bragg - Talking With The Taxman About Poetry
• Steve Earle - Guitar Town
• Bad Brains - I Against I

while these didn't make much of an impression or weren't to my taste

• The Blue Nile - A Walk Across The Rooftops
• Anthrax - Among The Living
• Lloyd Cole And The Commotions - Rattlesnakes
• Bauhaus - Mask 
• The Psychedelic Furs - Talk Talk Talk
• The Teardrop Expoldes - Kilimanjaro 
• Venom - Black Metal
• Tom Tom Club - Tom Tom Club
• Heaven 17 - Penthouse And Pavement
• Eurythemics - Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)
• Culture Club - Colour By Numbers
• Soft Cell - Non-Stop Erotic Cabaret

Just look at those last four! I warned you we were in the eighties!

Anyway, keep your eyes peeled, as it's list season and I'll be mulling over my favourites from this year at some point, so hopefully see you for that.

Stick or Twist: WWF Fully Loaded 2000

WWF Fully Loaded 2000

July 23rd 2000, Reunion Arena, Dallas, Texas

Attendance: 16,504

Again, being the Tagged Classics version, there's no scratch logo/WWF censoring which is an absolute God send. This was the first staging I can remember when the video screens changed depending on the match. It wasn't a concept that would be utilised fully until Wrestlemania the next year, but it was interesting to see.

*The opening VT is all gambling based, which I found a bit random. I didn't realise Fully Loaded was a gambling term?

*T&A come out with Trish for the opening match and my goodness Trish is smoking hot here.

We get a video package of the Trish-Lita feud, including Lita's shit attempt at Matt's legdrop & Trish putting her through a table then whipping her. Lita is still selling her ribs.

Match 1: Six Person Tag Team Match - T&A (Test & Albert) & Trish Stratus vs Team Xtreme (Matt & Jeff Hardy & Lita)

Brawl to start as Matt & Albert pair off, botching the lucha/test of strength stuff. Matt tries to land on the apron after being backdropped in the corner but falls outside. Test tags in but eats a legdrop. Tag to Jeff, but Test sits up at the wrong time during a Hardy double team, so Jeff's senton nearly missed & Matt fistdropped canvas. King on Jeff's hair: "He looks like a box of Lucky Charms". Better than Fruity Pebbles I guess.  MASSIVE sidewalk slam by Test. A plancha by Jeff halts a small WE WANT PUPPIES chant. There's a big Lita chant, as Test DECAPITATES a freshly tagged Matt. 

TAG TO TRISH! Test holds Matt so she can slap him, but he ducks and rolls up Trish (lucky bugger) only for Test to break it up & DDT him. Trish misses an elbow, and Lita gets the tag, but Trish tags Albert (uh-oh). They play cat & mouse before the Hardys jump in. POETRY IN MOTION! Double suplex to Albert, then a TRIPLE suplex to Trish & Test. Team Xtreme strip. King proposes he takes his shirt off too. JR: "Please don't".

Albert gorilla presses Jeff all the way out to the floor! Then his awesome butterfly suplex gets 2. T&A double backdrop Jeff, who bumps like it's a gorilla press and nearly dies. Big full nelson slam by Test followed by a RESTHOLD. Jeff's Frankensteiner is blocked into a powerbomb, but Test misses the top rop elbow. Mule kick! Tag to Matt! Clothesline & second rope bulldog by Matt, only for Test to pump handle slam him. Jeff Swanton's Test as he covers Matt. Albert interrupts but his powerslam is countered to a DDT.

TAG TO LITA! TORNADO DDT TO TEST! His bumping for that was ridiculous. Crossbody to Albert on the outside, then the Lita-canrana on Test for 2! The crowd actually bought that near fall. Albert cheap shots Lita's bruise, then Test hits a VICIOUS Doctor bomb and tags Trish, who covers for 2. Bulldog by Trish gets 2 as the crowd want puppies. Trish looks super indecisive in the ring. She gets hung up on top and SUPERPLEXED. Albert breaks up the fall, leading to the Hardys and T&A brawling & Lita getting the Moonsault for 3 and a big pop! 

Winners: Team Xtreme

*Post match, Albert Pearl Harbour's Lita! T&A then batter the Hardys to ASSHOLE chants & Trish whips Lita "like a Government mule" once again.

Verdict:7.5/10. Really high energy opener, there were lots of botches at the start but things picked up when they teased the women getting involved. T&A well very underutilised and the crazy-bumping Hardys were a good match for them, while Lita and (an albeit nervous) Trish upped the standard of spots you expect from women in the WWF.

*Backstage, Edge finds Commissioner Foley & says Christian has food poisoning. He slaps Edge on the arm ("You been training delts?") and doesn't buy it, saying he has "fraidy-cat-itus".

*The Undertaker arrives on his motorcycle! He finds Kurt Angle who promptly shits himself. Taker spits tobacco & gives chase. He drives all the way into the locker room! Kurt eventually gives him the slip.

Match 2: Tazz vs Al Snow

Recap of Tazz's random attacks on Kane, Rikishi & 2 Cool, as commentary get over how you never know who's next & how unstable Tazz is. As you'd expect. It's Tazz.

Snow looks very angry (must have been told to give a promo after twenty squat thrusts) and attacks from the bell with a Russian Leg Sweep. They brawl outside. Snow blocks a T-Bone attempt & superkicks Tazz. Belly-to-belly powerbomb gets 2. Snow tries to spring out of the corner but gets Alabama Slammed. JR says Al is a 17 year veteran (already!?) and he comes back with a BIG top rope leg drop and a less impressive Moonsault, drawing a two count and BORING chants. SNOW'S GOT HEAD! But Tazz chop blocks him. Tazz grounds him with crossfaces but Snow comes back with his trapping headbutts. A kick gets blocked into a cradle Tazzplex. Snow rolls through a Tazzmission attempt, but Tazz gets it eventually after a standing switch. Snow taps.

Winner: Tazz

Verdict: 5/10. Inoffensive lower card filler. Al probably got a bit too much offence but Tazz still got the advantage by suplexing and being nasty, which is the best way to get him over.

*Backstage, Christian is apparently barfing in the loo. The Doctor checks him over as Christian says they're the fighting-est champions of all time. After not a very thorough check (just a torch to the eyes) the doctor concludes he can't compete. Mick taps Christian on the back, prompting more puking.

*HHH & Steph are in their locker room. She's getting loads of flowers & Trips is pissed as they're not from him. Steph: "You mean they aren't from you?" Hunter: "I... was... gonna get you flowers, but..." BUSTED. HHH looks for a card, and finds one saying "Best of luck... It's true, it's true", so they suspect Kurt Angle.

Match 3: WWF Europena Championship Match - Eddie Guerrero (C) (w/ Chyna) vs Perry Saturn (w/ Terri)

Eddie & Chyna have a little tiff on the way to the ring... shoot? Naw, commentary put over the vile mood she's in after getting slapped by Terri on Smackdown. Saturn has the siren entrance and Terri's hiding behind him.

Eddie tries to stop Chyna going after her, but he gets shoved off & she knocks down Saturn. Saturn returns the favour & Eddie gives chase, bringing him to the ring to Eddie chants. Beautiful heelo by Eddie followed by his naff reverse elbow. Saturn rolls to the outside but gets Chyna-lined (which he Rikishi bumps for). Chyna looks happier now, as Eddie hits an ace top rope Frankensteiner. He throws him out to Chyna again, who whips him to the stairs. Big crossbody to the outside from Eddie. King's just realised Saturn's from Boston. "I thought he was from Mars or somewhere... or Saturn!"

Another Frankensteiner by Eddie gets 2, but he goes to the well too often and his next attempt is blocked into a powerbomb. Big tornado DDT by Eddie gives Perry a hardway on his big bald head. A flapjack and face first body press by Saturn gets 2. He tries another but gets hurracanranaed (again!), only to block the next attempt with another powerbomb. After taking AAAGES Perry rightfully misses his Moonsault. Brainbuster by Eddie, but he has to roll out of his froggy splash attempt as Saturn moved. A reverse nelson roll up gives Saturn a two count, which he celebrates by doing the Randy Orton "O" pose with his arms. He tries going up top but gets dropkicked outside.

Chyna tries to attack but she gets clotheslined onto the Spanish announce table, which breaks! (more on that later) This means Terri's safe to come back out, so Perry promptly hides behind her before she kicks Eddie in the cojones. Top rope elbow to the back by Saturn get the three! New champion!

Winner: Perry Saturn (New WWF European Champion, 1st reign)

Verdict: 7/10. Much better than the Judgement Day European Title match, I really liked the start, and while the middle got a bit samey with all the Frankensteiners, I appreciated the story where being confident enough to repeat your manoeuvres cost you.

*Edge & Christian are packing their bags, gloating about how gullible Foley was. Edge: "Food poisoning rules!" *high five*. Foley walks in, prompting dry heaving by Christian. Edge: "I think YOU make him sick." Christian: "Mick, don't look, I'm totally barfing in here!" Foley looks in the toilet cubicle & implausibly we see Christian is just cupping some disgusting looking mixture into the loo (where was the camera!? Kayfabe shattering here!). BUSTED! Mick: "You get an A for effort." They have to defend the titles after all.

*Taker is interviewed by Michael Cole, who says Angle will need a doctor to remove his foot from his arse. He then sees Angle on a monitor playing with his bike. Taker goes on the hunt. "YOU WANNA PLAY BOY! C'MERE YOU LITTLE BITCH!"

*Edge & Christian come out to the ring now, looking pretty happy despite being forced to defend the titles. Edge says Christian really is sick... of being in Dallas! They diss Dallas sports teams then make a tasteless JFK joke to ASSHOLE chants. Before those with flash photography could benefit, out come the APA. Bradshaw gives a passionate promo defending Dallas & gives out about E&C's cheap heat tactics... only to then give the biggest cheap heat face promo you'll see, name dropping Murdoch and the Von Erichs. He says parents everywhere will be able to tell their kids about the APA making E&C their personal bitches.

Match 4: WWF Tag Team Championship Match - Edge & Christian (C) vs APA (Farooq & Bradshaw)

Brawl on the outside as Farooq clobbers E&C with the steps. Poetry in motion is blocked by Bradshaw into a SUPER fallaway slam. Double shoulderblock gets 2. JR apologises for a third time about the JFK comments. Wicked powerbomb by Bradshaw, but a second attempt is countered by a dropkick from Christian. USA chants. E&C isolate Bradshaw, as Edge gets a neckbreaker for 2. A double superplex attempt is blocked by Bradshaw, who shoulderblocks Edge from the top.

Tag to Farooq! POWERSLAM! SPINEBUSTER! That gets 2. Christian eats the CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL! Edge knocks Bradshaw into the time keeper & grabs a tag belt. Dominator by Farooq on Christian but Edge whacks him with the belt for the DQ.

Winners: APA (by DQ, Edge & Christian retain the titles)

Verdict: 4/10. Nothing match. APA hit decent moves, E&C get cheap heat, we get a good hot tag then a BS finish. I guess it made sense story-wise, but seriously, fuck that finish!

*At WWF New York (remember that deal?), Boss Man asks a guy drinking at the bar for his ID, tells him not to step out of line and then sips some of his beer. What a cunt.

*HHH is still pissed about "Kurt" sending Steph flowers before his Last Man Standing match. Steph points out they don't say they're from Kurt but Trips cites the catchphrase, so it's obviously him. Steph says he should sort it (or abort it).

*...but Kurt's got his hands full with Taker. It looks like he's cornered, but he slips out back & whack's Taker's knee with a pipe wrench!

Match 5: Steel Cage Match for the WWF Intercontinental Championship: Val Venis (C) (w/ Trish Stratus) vs Rikishi

Victory is by pin, submission or escaping the cage. They replay Val winning the title from 'Kish thanks to Tazz's camera shot. Then they show Val tossing Scotty 2 Hotty off... the stage on Raw last week. Val has short hair & the club remix of his sex-jazz music. King questions how 'Kish will escape the cage with an arse that big. JR think's he'll want to win by pinfall.

Val tries to escape immediately but gets jerked off... the ropes. 'Kish rams Val into all sides of the cage & tries escaping. Val climbs next to him but gets knocked off. He heads for the door but 'Kish cuts him off. Val chop blocks Rikishi when he tries to go for the door himself. When Val throws 'Kish into the cage, he throws him into the brackets. Damn. He beats on 'Kish in the corner, but it's countered and they tease the Stinkface, only for Val to low blow him & botch a second rope bulldog. Big clothesline by Val yields a Rikishi bump and a two count.

Both men climb again, but this time Val knocks 'Kish off and hits a rope walk elbow drop for 2. JR thought he should have climbed. King doesn't mind because he gets to see Trish count along with the ref. NOW Val climbs, but Rikishi catches him while he's half dangling out. Both men whack each other into the cage (busting Val open), leading to both men getting crotched on the top rope. Val then cuts 'Kish off at the door. Val: "Close that damn door!" Rikishi then sidesteps a head of steam to send him to the cage. Samoan Drop (and he's actually Samoan!)! Butt bump! Bonsai Drop... but Val's foot's on the ropes (rope break in a cage match?).

'Kish heads for the door, but Trish slams it in his face! Neckbreaker by Val, followed by the Money Shot! 1, 2, ...Rikishi kicks out! LITA IS OUT HERE! SHE'S WHIPPING TRISH! The crowd loves it. Both men climb again, but 'Kish knocks Val off into the ref. He reaches the top of the cage... but sees Val inside. He shimmies along the top... SUPERFLY SPLASH OFF THE CAGE TO VAL!!!! That has to be seen to be believed.

Massive Rikishi chants. Val is dead.'Kish crawls to the door, but that damned Tazz is out & whacks him with a camera to massive heat. JR calls Tazz garbage as Val covers for 3.

Winner: Val Venis (still Intercontinental Champion)

Verdict: 7/10. Good stuff al round here. Lots of escape attempts to get over the stipulation.  No doubt though, the big moment in this match was Rikishi's splash at the end, which was amazing and showed the lengths he'd go to to get the title.

*We see Taker backstage, who rubs the number off the "__ of days without incident" sign. Excellent!

*HHH looks for Kurt, but finds Harvey Whippleman(!) with more flowers, and demands to be taken to him. He gets shown to a room expecting Kurt, but gets twatted behind the closed door, which then opens to reveal Jericho! MIND GAMES!

*Shane McMahon comes out wearing Rock's "Just Bring It!" T-shirt, so King thinks that's Shane's catchphrase! We get SHANE'S A PUSSY chants, but Shane says he's out here to prove that's not true, by calling out The Rock! He says it wouldn't be for the title, as Benoit will win that tonight. He hopes Rock has no excuses like all these typical Texans! He does his jiving & says "Just Bring It!"

*Out comes Rock, who's looking for Benoit, expecting a sneak attack. He says 20,000 Rock fans can't be wrong & Shane IS a pussy, then speculates on Benoit's whereabouts: under the ring? In the rafters? Up Shane's candy ass? IT DOESN'T MATTER because The Rock wants to fight now.

*We see Benoit backstage, saying Rock shouldn't worry about being DQed (meaning he'd lose the title in a special stipulation) because Benoit will tap him out or pin him. He then pulls apart Rock's "GQ clothing", as we find he's trashing Rock's locker room. Rock gives chase.

*We get a video package for the first of our TRIPLE MAIN EVENTS, Angle vs Taker, including Kurt inadvertently ruining Taker's bike with milk backstage. Note, Kurt is King of the Ring, and as such was SUPPOSED to have had a title match at this event, but there's no explanation as to how that didn't happen during this show.

Match 6: Kurt Angle vs The Undertaker

Kurt comes out still holding the wrench and is scared of his own pyro. Nice! Taker comes out while Kurt's music is still playing (saves having to pay Kid Rock too) and Pearl Harbour's Angle! He beats him up 'round ringside. Big boot. Big elbow. Taker covers but pulls Angle up before 3. BIIIG stalling vertical suplex by Taker but again he pulls Angle up before 3. Angle comes back with a sleeper but gets squashed in the corner. Corner clothesline & sidewalk slam get 2. Angle's thrown outside, but attacks with the wrench when the ref's not looking!

He works over the leg with pick ups & grapevines, but Taker legdrops out. Slugfest, and Angle wins(?) and works Taker's leg more after blocking a chokeslam. Taker rolls through a leglock and gets some body shots. Chokeslam! The ref asks him to cover but Taker says he ain't done. Last Ride! 1, 2, ...3!

Winner: The Undertaker

Verdict: 3/10. Far too one sided, Angle's offence was less than spectacular. Way to squash your King of the Ring.

*We see Rock return to his locker room looking pissed.

*Video package for Jericho vs HHH, featuring Y2J kissing Steph at King of the Ring & HHH repeatedly saying "I want Jericho's ass". Wit-woo! Jericho has taped ribs after a sledgehammer attack.

Match 7: Last Man Standing Match - Triple H (w/ WWF Women's Champion Stephanie McMahon Helmsley) vs Chris Jericho

You win when your opponent can't answer a ten count. There's no DQ or pinfalls. This is still only the second Last Man Standing match, blimey!

Brawl to start. Jericho gets momentum with clotheslines and dropkicks. They brawl with the broken Spanish announce table. Back in the ring Jericho gets a top rope reverse elbow. The Game turns the tide with the face breaker as they go back outside. Hot shot onto the barricade as a "Stephanie swallows"(?) chant breaks out. HHH zones in on the ribs & rips off Y2J's tape. King says that's lucky because if they're on for too long they'll cause a rash. Shoulders in the corner. Wow, Mike Chioda looks young. No attempts at counts yet which I like. HHH chokes Jericho with the tape, drawing Y2J chants. King: "How'd you like someone to call your wife a trash bag ho?" JR: " How'd you like someone to call ALL YOUR wives that?" King: "All my wives? I'm not married..." JR: "That's my point!"

Back outside, Steph slaps Y2J and we get out first count. Y2J back up at 5 & back in the ring. Abdominal stretches by Trips. The ref forces the break  because he was using the ropes (WHY? NO DQ!) before Jericho hip tosses out of it. Hunter rightly give the ref shit for that & we get the HEBNER SHOVING SPOT. Spin wheel kick by Jericho! Lionsault... which HHH gets the knees up to. DDT by HHH as a count begins. King bemoans the slow count. JR speculates it's retaliation for the shoving match earlier. Sleeper by HHH with the body scissors. The arm drops three times, but Jericho is up at 9 for the all important ten count. JR implores Jericho to stay down, but he just talks smack to HHH, asking for more. JR puts over how tough Jericho is. Y2J says suck it! PEDIGREE! Hunter looks pissed. The count is on as The Game "lazy boy"s in the corner. 7... 8... 9... he's up to the ropes & HHH is FURIOUS.

He bring in a chair & batters Y2J's ribs with it. Pedigree on the chair... is countered with a bollock shot! Chair to the head of HHH! (BLADE BLADE BLADE!!!) Jericho is selling fatigue brilliantly. HHH is up at 7 & Y2J zones in on the wound. Second rope dropkick! Bulldog on the chair! The count is on but Y2J is still attacking. He whips HHH over the top but gets whipped to the steps. Pedigree on the steps... countered with a backdrop. HHH desperately strips the announce table. Both men get monitors & knock each other down with them simultaneously. Great call back to the first LMS, which JR points out. 8... 9...  BOTH men are up! Back in the ring... Pedigree... no, countered with the Walls!

HHH is tapping but Y2J won't let go. HHH gets to the rope but NOW the ref refuses to call a break. Y2J pulls him back to the centre before Steph grabs him by the hair. Slap blocked... WALLS OF JERICHO ON STEPHANIE!!! HHH breaks it up & we head back near the announce table. The Game's got the sledgehammer. He swings & misses (but hits the post, drawing a great sound effect). Catapult to the post by Jericho! He hits Hunter in the ribs with the sledgehammer. 

He tries to Lionsault HHH through the table but gets low blowed. Both men are on the timekeeper's desk now... BACK SUPLEX THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!! THE COUNT IS ON! Both men are devastated. JR: "Bah Gawd count faster and put them out of their misery." 7... 8... HHH stirring... 9... 10 - TRIPLE H IS UP! TRIPLE H WINS! But immediately collapses again in an excellent bit of selling.

Winner: Triple H

Verdict: 9/10. Ace match, the best they've had together. Jericho looked damn tough out of this, with the former WWF champion only beating him by the narrowest margin. HHH was just ON at this point and could deliver the goods whenever asked. The finish was meant to be from the English to the Spanish announce tables, not from the timekeeper's desk to the announce table, but Chyna broke the Spanish one so they had to improvise. It was till an excellent, narrow finish.

* The video package for the WWF title match makes no attempt to explain how Benoit became the number one contender over KotR winner Angle. It shows Rock fetching Benoit from the locker room & twatting him good & proper, prompting Commissioner Foley to add the stipulation that Rock could lose the title on a DQ, to try and motivate him to win properly.

Main Event: World Wrestling Federation Championship Match - The Rock (C) vs Chris Benoit (w/ Shane McMahon)

Benoit comes to the ring in one of Rock's shirts that he's just ripped up. JR puts over that Rock has already lost the title by DQ at Judgement Day. Shane tries to jump Rock after his entrance, but Rock spots it, only for Benoit to then jump him & we're under way!

Elbow by Rock after an early crossface attempt. Big Rocky chants. He chases Shane around and inside the ring, clotheslines Benoit, then chases Shane again in one fell swoop. Inverted atomic drop by Rock, followed by a catapult into Shane (who was originally on the wrong apron, which made things look contrived). ROCK goes for the crossface but Benoit scrambles away. Benoit gets the advantage with a knee to the gut & starts working the mid section (just like the LMS match, dammit D'Lo!). Chants of SHANE'S A PUSSY & BENOIT SUCKS. Another knee lift gets 2.

Rock hangs Benoit on the top rope & punts his chest. King: "An XFL punt!" *sigh*. Benoit jumps up top in one swift move ala RVD, but gets crotched and back superplexed for his troubles. Both men beat the count and Shane distracts the ref, allowing Benoit to hit Rock with the belt! 1, 2, ...NO! He cuts Rock off some more with suplexes. Sharpshooter on The Rock. He crawls to the ropes... and gets there! Rock fights out of a second attempt but gets low bridged by Shane. He fights back, whipping Benoit to the steps & crotching him around the ring post (DQ?).

Back inside... Dragon Screw by Rock! Figure Four! Benoit gets to the ropes, then knocks Rock outside to Shane, who sends him over the barricade. Benoit gives chase, but Rock throws a fan's drink in his face (DQ?). Benoit suplexes him over the barricade. Back in the ring... DDT by Rock! Which gets 2. Benoit regains the advantage with a backbreaker, Shane's dirty tactics and a neckbreaker for 2. Rock comes back... alley oop into the top rope! He covers but Benoit's foot was on the rope. Benoit comes back with a knock down and the flying headbutt, but is too knackered to make the cover.

Rock back with rights. SPINE ON THE PINE! PEOPLE'S ELBOW! But Shane is distracting the ref. He finally gets there. 1, 2... NO! Benoit brawls back. Superplex city! The count starts amid Rocky chants. Cover by Benoit... gets 2! Both men trade clotheslines, then Benoit gets a chair. Shane now comes in & nails the ref in the back with a chair. Rock chases Shane off. CROSSFACE BY THE ROCK!!!

The ref gets in position and calls for the bell, so everyone thinks Benoit submitted, but he didn't. It turns out THE ROCK IS DQED! THE REF THOUGHT IT WAS HIM THAT HIT HIM WITH THE CHAIR! Shane hits Rock with a chair. Benoit is announced as the champion!!!

They replay the incident & Commissioner Foley comes out. JR says the DQ thing backfired on him. Foley chants. He says he didn't see a DQ, to a big pop, & no-one in Dallas saw one either, so he's RESTARTING THE MATCH! Rock with the "Just Bring It!" pose to Benoit and we see he's busted open. JR: "Dammit the fight is on!"

They brawl but Benoit hits the three Germans! 1, 2... Rock out at 2 to massive Rocky chants. Benoit tries the crossface... and gets it after pulling Rock away from the ropes. It's a long, slow crawl to the ropes for Rock. JR: "Inches away... but it might as well be a mile if he can't get to the bottom rope!" He gets there! Benoit tries again... ROCK BOTTOM!!! 1... 2... 3!

Winner: The Rock (still World Wrestling Federation Champion)

Verdict: 8/10. Well how about it, a Dusty finish that vaguely made sense! I guess they figured having Jericho winning the title only for the decision to be reversed worked enough to make it worthwhile doing with Benoit too. It certainly didn't do him any harm. They put over how well Benoit took it to The Rock, although Rock didn't look like a slouch either, as he opened up his playbook a bit for this match, busting out some different stuff. These two had really good chemistry and I'd have liked to have seen more high profile matches from them.

Final Thoughts: Another good show overall, a few more peaks and troughs than Judgement Day. The Taker - Angle match was worthless and the Tag Title match was much less entertaining than the build to it. And Tazz - Snow was just kind of there. But other than that you had a pretty innovative opener, a neat European title match, a great effort in the cage, a fabulous LMS match and an exciting and controversial main event. Another thumbs up.

Final Verdict: STICK

"Paaan's People!"

Stick or Twist: WWF Judgement Day 2000

Hello there.

So one of the few interests of mine I haven't brought up on this blog yet is... WRESTLING! Like most people I became obsessed with it in 1999/2000 when it was in it's biggest boom period. I still keep up with it and sporadically enjoy WWE, although nowadays I'm much more into New Japan Pro Wrestling because it's a much more consistent product and everyone beats the SHIT out of each other. I'm also enjoying TNA's second British Boot Camp at the minute - good lord there's so much talent on these shores.

Anyway, this is a tryout for an idea I considered for a podcast, but decided would be too time consuming and needed too many resources I don't have (some good recording equipment, at least one wing man), so I'm giving it a go as a column instead to see how it reads. (If podcasts are more your thing check out the lads at OSW Review, they're consistently hilarious).
I thought it would be a good idea to run through my old DVDs and re-evaluate whether they're worth keeping (stick) or dumping (twist). This is my first go - the earliest one I had in terms of chronology of the actual shows. Let me know what you think.

WWF Judgement Day 2000

May 31st 2000, Freedom Hall, Louisville, KY

Attendance: 16, 827

This is the Silver Vision "Tagged Classics" edition, which means it's a direct rip of their old VHS edition and thus there's ZERO censorship of the old WWF scratch logo or people saying "WWF". Happy days!

* The opening video package is themed around the 60 Minute Iron Man main event, and highlights everything that you do in an hour, including thinking of sex at least 21 times (awkwardly they then cut to footage of HHH and The Rock straight after this fact). We also get one of the all time classic Mr. McMahon quotes: "LIFE SUCKS... AND THEN YOU DIE!"

*After the opening pyro we cut backstage to the McMahon-Helmsley regime, and Vince bemoan's the absence of Pat Patterson: "How can we have an event without Patterson here?". HARDCORE CHAMPION Gerald Brisco then enters and takes everyone's coffee orders. X-Pac asks for some ice in his because he's a douche. Vince then runs down the matches involving the faction tonight.

*Suddenly we cut elsewhere to see the Headbangers beating up Brisco attempting to win his title! 24/7 baby! 

*We then see the special referee for the main event, Shawn Michaels, walking backstage in his ref shirt and boy shorts.

* Kurt Angle comes out to the arena, and says since he's been hanging with Edge & Christian he's got more attention from the ladies - rumour has it he's "all that"! A sign in the crowd reads "Deport Angle". He then fluffs some lines of a nursery rhyme about his three I's and introduces Edge & Christian (the WWF Tag Champs) to screams from girls in the audience.

*E&C come out with sacks, as Christian say how good it is to be in LEWIS-ville to massive heat. Then, "for the benefit of those with flash photography..." we get a five second pose of Kentucky's greatest cultural achievement: the Jug Band!

Match 1: Too Cool (Scotty 2 Hotty & Grandmaster Sexay) & Rikishi vs Kurt Angle, Edge & Christian

Talk on commentary quickly turns to Rikishi's arse, as King wonders what those false teeth from the jug band pose would look like in it.

The heels Pearl Harbour the faces only to get stacked in the corner and butt bombed, although Angle bails before he can suffer the final one. 2 Cool double team and Scotty moonwalks but Christian sneak attacks. Grandmaster throws himself across the top turnbuckle to save Scotty from a whip in the corner. Edge tries the same for Christian but just gets hung up on the top rope. His head then gets drop toe hold-ed into Christian's bollocks but the crowd are too busy chanting for Rikishi to notice. Randomly, Grandmaster's trousers fall down which causes corpsing from his teammates (send for the man!).

Christian's mocking of 2 Cool's dancing allows Rikishi to tag in. Angle tags in too and nearly gets squished with a standing Bonsai Drop counter to a sunset flip. King: "Just say no to crack!". Scotty tags in and tries The Worm, but Angle cuts him off. Classic heel blind tag by Edge. The heels isolate Scotty for barely ten seconds and already the crowd are desperate for him to get the tag, chanting ANGLE SUCKS. Scotty counters a powerbomb with an alley oop onto the top rope and gets the hot tag to Rikishi! He cleans house, squashes all three heels in the corner and gives Angle the Stinkface (for some reason called the Stinkyface here).

A Rikishi Driver attempt is countered into a double DDT but 'Kish no sells it, only to get speared by Edge. Edge mocks The Worm, but gets Wormed himself! Superkick by Grandmaster and a Worm for Angle too. Rikishi goes for the Rikishi Driver on Edge, but Christian whacks him with the ring bell. Edge covers but Grandmaster hits him with the hip hop drop! 1, 2, ...3! (Angle was blatantly meant to break that up but missed his cue.)

Winners: 2 Cool & Rikishi

Verdict: 6.5/10. Lots of fun, the crowd loved 2 Cool & 'Kish, although the screw up at the end made the finish feel a bit abrupt. You can tell it was a mistake by the looks on everyone's faces and the fact the replay only focuses on Angle getting the Stinkface.

*After the match 2 Cool & 'Kish do their winning routine and beg Rikishi to dance to a massive Rikishi chant from the crowd. FARTY PYRO!

*JR gets over HBK as the ref for the main event ("But whose side is he on!?"), and we cut backstage to Shawn being interviewed by Michael Cole. Cole says Shawn saw both Steph and The Rock on Heat, and Shawn says he's not been around in a while and is just saying hi and, while HHH is his boy, people should judge the job he's done after the match. Cole heard rumours online that Shawn will screw Rock, prompting Shawn to shit on the internet & end the interview.

*Earlier on Heat, Eddie Guerrero & Chyna arrived in a dated looking low rider. Eddie is awesome here: "You know you loooove the love machine baby!" Dean Malenko & Perry Saturn then turn up and are very wooden, laying claim to Eddie's European title. Chyna says she'll stay out of their business (while lifting her sunglasses and giving a massive wink).

Match 2: WWF European Championship Match - Eddie Guerrero (C) (w/ Chyna) vs Perry Saturn vs Dean Malenko (WWF Light Heavyweight Champion)

Another crowd sign: "Chyna, how about Redneck Heat!". Chyna has brought some loaded roses to the ring which JR puts over (despite them being the worse weapon in No Mercy). He then says Chyna was the wedge that broke the R4dicals up and points out Saturn is the only member who hasn't won a title yet. King: "I like Perry Saturn, it's like he's watching a tennis match without moving his head". Malenko is the only guy to come out to the R4dicals' group music which makes him look like a jobber.

Perry & Dean double team Eddie with Demolition's old finisher, but Perry turns on Dean quickly and hits a HUGE gorilla press on Eddie. Eddie counters a suplex with a double mule kick to the others' cajones (JR: "He got four in one there!") and quickens the pace, botching a rope walk Frankensteiner on Malenko but having better luck with a regular one on Saturn. It's obvious Eddie is the only one in the match with a marginal bit of (Latino) heat. Saturn & Malenko try to hit a Doomsday Device on Eddie, but Perry double crossed Dean again, using Eddie to crotch him on the top. Eventually Dean gets a super gutbuster on Eddie.

Saturn then steal's both men's finishers (he's twirled the analogue stick anti-clockwise then), so then Eddie gives him the brainbuster and Dean gives him the Rings of Saturn. Malenko then did a shitty Bossman cop-out Frog Splash on Eddie. A chain of suplexes (Saturn suplexes Eddie, who's suplexing Dean) prompts Chyna to deck Perry with the roses while the ref was distracted (King claims they're just stale!). Malenko blocks Chyna's attempt to hit him with the roses though, so she gets off the apron with Dean holding the roses and trips him up face first on them, allowing Eddie to roll him up with a beautiful Mahistral for the 3!

Winner: Eddie Guerrero (still champion)

Verdict: 6/10. A much sloppier match than you'd expect from these three, they might have got away with it if the crowd cared more than they did. Also JR mentioned Malenko had the chance to be a double champion - could there be a LESS prestigious pair of titles to have than the European and Ligh Heavyweight titles?)

*While celebrating, Eddie rips the roses apart to reveal a lead pipe. Who'd have guessed! Chyna plays dumb.

*We get a replay of how Brisco won the Hardcore title on Smackdown by pinning a sleeping Crash Holly. Cole & King whispered along to this for some reason. We then see Gerry in the men's lavs, scared by his own reflection. The idiot even calls it a sunofabitch and punches it.

*A video package for the Shane McMahon vs Big Show match shows a sick bump Shane took into the Titantron, along with his rubbish joint effort chokeslam ("The Simba Slam") he and his cronies put on Big Show.

Match 3: No Holds Barred & Falls Count Anywhere - Shane McMahon vs Big Show

JR think's it might be appropriate Shane's coming out to "No Chance In Hell". This is the first time Shane parodied his opponent's shirt, coming out in Big Show's shirt but with his own "Which way did he go?" catchphrase on the back. Show, in a pet peeve of mine, comes out in a shirt featuring his old haircut.

Shane tries a suicide dive to start but Show catches him & throws him to the ring steps. JR: "That's one of those XFL style catches", just in case you forgot what year this was. Show steps on Shane's hand on the steps, gets a pop for taking him into the crowd then presses him back in the ring. He literally starts kicking Shane's arse! After his always impressive superkick he calls for the chokeslam but Bossman comes out and attacks with the nightstick (no holds barred!). Show fights back with the safest Vader-style powerbomb you'll see. T&A (Test & Albert) then come out with chairs but Show punches them away. Trish is out now, and low blow's Show, but he no sells it and then throws Trish arse first over the top rope onto T&A (lucky buggers).

Shane's crawling away towards the tron, but Show gives chase. They repeat the tron bump from Raw. Show rips a girder off the set but Shane dropkicks him & T&A attack. Shane runs the girder into Shows head with a case for a 2 count. Show fights back, throwing T&A into the tron, which Shane tries to climb up (you'll have to wait another few months for that spot mate). Bull Buchanan's out now, attacking Show with the nightstick, which allows Shane to drop an amplifier on Big Show's leg (drawing fake sparks), and then break a "cinder block" (probably made of flour it broke so easily) over his head for the three count (falls count anywhere!). Show gets taken to an ambulance.

Winner: Shane McMahon

Verdict: 7/10. Typcial entertaining ADD Shane upset match, that was a good way to write off Big Show while he... worked on his cardio or something.

*Brisco asks to hang in the referee's locker room to relax, promptly falling asleep. The refs try to sneak on him, causing him to flip out and say he'll mention this to "Mr MACMAN".

*HHH is backstage with HBK, catching up, asking about his family & making fun of his shorts. Shawn says he loves his shorts.

*The video package for Benoit vs Jericho debates who has the better submission move. We also see Hardcore Holly injured Benoit's knee on Smackdown, while JR mentions Y2J's shoulder isn't 100% either.

Judgment Day 2000: Chris Benoit vs Jericho promo by RatedREdgeHead316

Match 4: Submission Match for the WWF Intercontinental Championship - Chris Benoit (C) vs Chris Jericho

Benoit comes out in a knee brace due to Holly's attack, and looks ripped. Jericho meanwhile... state of your pony tale mate. JR puts over both men's similarities (Both Canadian, both trained by Harts etc.)

Chop war to start. Y2J tries a fujiwar armbar (why?) but Benoit hits him with a shoulder breaker (King: "I'm not gonna say what that looks like to me.") and hits the flying headbutt to the shoulder! Commentary FINALLY get over that any submission could win the match & it's not just the crossface versus the Walls of Jericho while Benoit applies a seated abdominal stretch. Jericho then hits his apron dropkick (as we cut to Val Venis, who's challenged the winner - state of your IC title division mate!) and gives Benoit a shinbreaker on the stairs. Like an idiot, Y2J goes for a cover after a double arm backbreaker. Another chop war. King: "Let's you & I try that JR." JR: "I'll pass."

Another idiotic move by Jericho, going for a shoulder barge in the corner only to eat the ring post. Benoit (barely) exposes the turnbuckle & sends Jericho into it. RESTHOLD. Chop war again, before Benoit hits a snap suplex & knees the wrong shoulder! Cross armbreaker by Benoit, forcing Jericho to the ropes (while Bob Holly looks on). Now Benoit's being an idiot, trying to knee Jericho in the corner, only for Jericho to move and flapjack him onto the knee (nice). A shit Dragon Screw attempt is countered to a mount and tiny BORING chants. Y2J manages to remove Benoit's brace & starts whipping him with it. LIONSAULT! Jericho follows up with a TARANTOOLA!!! (Walls of Jericho with Benoit wrapped in the ropes). Benoit fights out.

After ducking an enzughiri, Benoit starts reeling off German suplexes. The third gets countered into a Walls attempt by Jericho, but Benoit whacks him with the knee brace and gets the Crippler Crossface! Big Y2J chants as Benoit pulls him closer to the centre and modifies it into a choke. Y2J sturggle valiantly but passes out and Benoit wins. Benoit refuses to let go after the bell.

Winner: Chris Benoit (still champion)

Verdict: 8/10. Well that finish was awkward knowing what we do now about Benoit. It was irritating to see two supposedly smart, ring generals have their characters make some totally idiotic moves but apart from that this was solid work, and Jericho refusing to tap was a nice touch. We'd love it if there was an IC title match this good nowadays.

*Cole is backstage with Brisco, who bemoans how everyone wants his Hardcore title. Even his boys back home and his neighbours are trying to beat him and warns Cole off any funny ideas...

*handbags* "Oooooh!"

Behind them we see some vendor guys ask a ref to help them beat Brisco, who finally notices & beats them up.

*Rock is in the locker room berating Shawn to call the main event down the middle otherwise it'll be between the two of them "and it's sure as hell not gonna take sixty miuntes" (*handbags* Oooooh!"). Shawn just rolls his eyes.

Match 5: Tag Team Tables Match - The Dudley Boyz (D-Von & Bubba Ray) vs D-Generation X (Road Dogg & X-Pac w/ Tori)

First team to put both members of the other team through tables wins. We see a replay of Tori splashing Bubba through a table on Raw, with D-Von promising they'll testify at Judgement Day. Road Dogg does his typical face schtick before the match even though DX are the heels. This is the first time the Dudleys get pyro I think (and it's only a tiny flame). JR: "Who's gonna get wood tonight?"

For some reason they start this like a regular tag match (wtf?). D-Von controls Road Dogg with elbows, only for X-Pac to give him a roundhouse kick (and his stupid Bruce Lee posing). Dudleys regain control after a lovely second rope clothesline by Bubba and "WASSUP!"'s without the verbal bits (but only when Tori had the ref's attention - why? It's no DQ)  to both men, drawing BIG tables chants. DX try to leave, but the Dudleys stop them. Another interesting crowd sign: "Chyna is my Dad". Bubba tells Road Dogg "Eat this!"only to then hit the shittest punch ever. He gets in a trance looking at Tori & DX take advantage, double teaming D-Von. Bronco Buster to X-Pac heat.

They're STILL persevering with tag rules. Bubba gives the ref shit & DX sneak in a double team choke (why do they have to sneak?). RD with the front chancery to work the crowd. Tag to Bubba but the ref misses it (WHY does it matter?!). Doulbe clothesline by D-Von & Bubba finally gets the tag. It's a total anticlimax, getting no heat until he tells X-Pac to suck it! He cleans house with a sidewalk slam, Bubba Bomb and Samoan Drop (and he's not even Samoan!) before FINALLY  calling for tables! Road Dogg whips D-Von into the steps when he gets the tables though, and then gives him the Stretch Armstrong through the table! DX need to put Bubba throug a table to win.

X-Pac tries to bronco buster D-Von through a table in the corner(!) (WHY?! He's already gone through a table!) but Bubba stops him and counters a leapfrog into a powerbomb through the table! The Dudleys must put Road Dogg through a table to win.

RD & Bubba brawl The ref tries to stop them but we get the ECW spot where they both throw him through a table propped in the corner. Dogg now think's Bubba's on his side like an idiot & does the Dudley's sign but gets DDTed. This prompts feminist icon Gerald Brisco to come out. 3D through the table on Dogg but the ref's still down! Brisco pulls RD out of the ring. Tori comes in to buy time but Bubba grabs her. JR: "Tori's going to get some SERIOUS WOOD TONIGHT!" ...is that even physically possible?

Brisco interrupts the attempted superbomb on Tori (Bubba only selling at the second time of asking), and X-Pac gets the SUPER X-Factor on Bubba through the table, just as Brisco gets the ref up, to win it for DX!!!

Winners: DX

Verdict: 5/10. God, I thought the IC title match had logic holes! This was really odd, I mean why keep up the pretence of a regular tag match? The crowd didn't even get into the hot tag. I just found it difficult to suspend my disbelief, this was a bigger mess than it should have been.

*After the match the Dudleys get their heat back by 3D-ing Brisco through a table (poor Gerry - what a night for him!)

* We get an ominous video with the creepy Shining girls, hyping The Undertaker's return. "Are you scared?" JR plays dumb.

*Video package for the main event, with HHH continually asking "Can you haaang, Rock?"  (*handbags* Oooooh!") Pinfalls, submissions, count outs and DQs will all count as falls. The man with the most falls after 60 minutes wins the title. It also alludes to HBK screwing The Rock the last time he reffed a Rock v HHH match on the first Smackdown. Oh also, Rock's cowhide vest is RIDICULOUS.

*We see they're using the arena's score board to keep track of time and falls. HBK comes out first, gyrating and shockingly still drawing screams from the girls. He also shakes Fink's hand. HHH is out next, and awesomely, a fan ruins his water shot by blocking the boom camera with his Rock sign! JR points out neither man has wrestled 60 minutes before and tries to get over calling it "the hour". 

In a very babyface move, HHH tells the rest of the regime to go to the back because he wants to show he can do it himself. JR point out Rock retains in a tie, while King says HHH has the most to prove since he made the challenge. Good stuff.

Finally Rock comes out to a MONSTER pop, culminating in his pose in the corner.

It's main event time!

Main Event: 60 Minute Iron Man Match for the World Wrestling Federation Championship - The Rock (C) vs Triple H, Special Guest Referee - Shawn Michaels

Big time Rocky chants as Rock paces the ring, which King tells him not to do as it takes up energy - nice. Naturally there's loads of stalling to start & the first 30 seconds are all trash talk & going nose to nose. Commentary compare the match to the Kentucky Derby - "Those thoroughbreds only have to go for two minutes". Yeah, IN YOUR FACE HORSES! Rock gets the first knockdown & pin attempt, then another & an inside cradle, so HHH takes a breather on the outside.

5 MINUTES in and it's still all headlocks. LEAPFROG by Rock, followed by a right hand, causing HHH to stall outside again, taking exception to the closed fist & jaw-jacking with the fans. HHH tries his own leapfrog & naturally fails, but gains the advantage with a clothesline & starts working over Rock's arm. Divorce court gets 2.

10 MINUTES in & HHH has a rest hold on Rock's arm. Rock pulls Hunter's hair in the corner but Shawn does nothing, as we get another XFL reference (*groans*). HHH kicks Rock's head when he lowered it too early, only to then nonchalantly walk into a ROCK BOTTOM for 3! ROCK 1-0 HHH

HHH rolls outside but Rock gives chase, leading to the obligatory Attitude era ramp way brawl. HHH accidentally knees the barricade & gets suplexed back into the ring for 2. Rocky starts working HHH's leg as King points out HHH needs two falls really as a draw is no good to him. Shinbreaker in the steps! Just like the IC title match (Dammit D'Lo!). Rock starts kicking Hunter's leg out from his leg and locks in the Figure Four (to surprisingly few "WOOOO"s). Hunter sells it like a face ("Oh shit!") and rolls Rock over the second time of asking. Rock gets the ropes and they head back outside as some girls in the audience randomly go mental for The Rock. HHH takes him into the crowd for a pop. Big schmoz before HHH backdrops Rock back to ringside.

20 MINUTES in, as HHH gets a suplex ("and a beauty!") back in the ring, followed by elbow drops (instead of his usual knee drop in some nice selling of the knee). Head of steam by Rock just gets him sent over the top rope. Hunter's knees get whipped into the steps, prompting a Jim Andrews shout-out from JR. Rock then drapes HHH's hamstring over the second rope and knees it. Nice spot! RESTHOLD, followed by another Figure Four attempt, which HHH counters into the Pedigree for 3! ROCK 1-1 HHH

We then get a choke spot before HHH whips Rock into an inside cradle which gets 3 to big heat! BOOO! ROCK 1-2 HHH

Commentary are selling Rock still being out of it from the Pedigree. He comes back with rights only to get low bridged to the outside. More AE ramp brawling, this time including whips into the staging and suplex/block/suplex spots.

30 MINUTES in and Rock counters a headlock into a back suplex on the outside. He whips Hunter into the apron & backdrops him straight after. In a nice touch, HBK defends his lack of counting to the announce team, and King points out a double count out would make no difference to the score anyway. Back inside both men sell fatigue before HHH hits the face breaker and a beautiful piledriver for 3! ROCK 1-3 HHH

JR says HHH should play defence now which impresses King. "You sure you haven't wrestled before JR?" JR: "...Just me and the English language a few times." They sell the clock as The Rock's enemy now. HHH stomps a shit mudhole before HBK pulls him off & Rock EXPLODES out of the corner with a clothesline. That lights a fire under him before he's cut off with a reverse elbow for 2. HHH goes up top like an idiot and gets Flair-pressed off by Rock. Both men are down. A slugfest ensues, then they have a chat in the corner. BEAUTIFUL Mahistral by Rock gets 2 in a hot near fall. High knee by HHH gets 2. Rock's got a small hardway above his right eye. Another chat is followed by a sleeper by HHH. He keeps putting his feet on the ropes, but Shawn catches it the second time. They squabble a bit before another sleeper is countered into a side belly-to-belly suplex by Rock, which gets 2, but only because Rock too nearly 20 seconds to cover through exhaustion. Another whip gets reversed into a botched float-over DDT by Rock for 3! ROCK 2-3 HHH

King pleads with Rock to cover again, but JR says his head must not be right from fatigue. Outside they go as HHH tries to whack Rock with a chair but Shawn stops him to a big pop. Rock fights back with a neckbreaker on the floor. Back in the ring HHH begs off in the corner, but he just so happens to be by the chair again and WHACKS Rock in the head for the DQ. ROCK 3-3 HHH

The tie is short lived though, as HHH cradles Rock with his feet on the ropes for 3. ROCK 3-4 HHH

Rock has bladed. Shawn checks on him. HHH looks knackered, but gets the sleeper again. Amazingly Rock gets his arm up before the third drop and fights out, only to wind back in the sleeper and pass out, scoring HHH another fall. ROCK 3-5 HHH

HHH won't relinquish the hold so Shawn pulls him off by the hair. HEBNER SHOVING MATCH SPOT! 12 MINUTES REMAINING! HHH finally pulls his elbow pads up & Rock fights back, whipping Hunter to the corner over the top, his feet hitting the camera man on the way out. During some replays HHH gets a DDT for 2.

10 MINUTES TO GO! HHH goes up top again (idiot) and gets crotched. SUPERPLEX CITY! JR: "It's nut cuttin' time at 8:45". Rock finally gets a cover but only gets 2. JR says that may have been his last chance, calling Hunter's lead "apparently insurmountable", thus telegraphing that it's not. Clothesline over the top and a catapult into the ring post by Rock, who tells the Spanish announce team to expect trouble. HHH regains the advantage & pulls apart the ENGLISH  announce table instead (the Spanish guys are right there...). JR: "The table has been set King!" HHH tries to ROCK BOTTOM Rock through the table, but Rock counters and PEDIGREES HHH on the table!!! The table doesn't break and Rock & Shawn chat. Shawn counts mighty quickly as HHH gets counted out.  ROCK 4-5 HHH

Hunter blades and "the damned McMahons are back!" ASSHOLE chants as Vince, Shane & Steph come back out. Shawn starts another count but HHH barely gets in at 9. 3 MINUTE WARNING!!!

Rock knocks Shane & Vince off the apron to a big pop. SPINE ON THE PINE!  THE MOST Ridiculous Move in Sports Entertainment Today... The People's Elbow! 1, 2, 3! ROCK 5-5 HHH

Shane pulls Shawn out, so Shawn batters him & Vince to a BIG pop. Road Dogg & X-Pac jump their cue and try attacking Rock before Shawn's down. He finally does get knocked down as HHH gets whipped into him on the apron. ROCK BOTTOM as the Shining girls vignette plays on the tron. Rock gets quadruples teamed, but "now BACK from the dead"... HOLY SHIT IT'S BIKER TAKER! HE'S COMING FOR MACMAN!!!

Undertake cleans house with 30 seconds left. Chokeslams to Shane & Pac! Rights to Dogg & Vince! A Steph slap gets no sold. HHH stops him chokeslamming her, but gets chokeslammed himself. Crucially, Shawn sees this, before the buzzer. Taker Tombstones HHH as the buzzer sounds. Big pops from the crowd as Taker's back & they think Rock's retained. EYE ROLL by Taker.

But wait... Shawn has DQed Rock for Taker's interference! ROCK 5-6 HHH TRIPLE H IS THE NEW CHAMPION!!!

Winner: Triple H (New World Wrestling Federation Champion, 4th reign)

*Taker stalks Shawn to the back as the regime pull HHH out of the ring. Commentary speculate (incorrectly) Taker's attack on HHH was after the buzzer.

Verdict: 9/10. Well sod that finish obviously, but you have to take your hat off to Rock and Trips for this one. Three years of working together all the way to the top of the card paid off categorically. Just a really well wrestled, mostly logical match with tonnes of drama and nice story: cocky challenger HHH gets caught out early only to regroup and give Rock a lead to chase. Having HHH take the lead with more elementary moves like a cradle and a piledriver was a great decision, as it made you CONVINCED when Rock hit stuff like the Mahistral and the belly-to-belly that he was getting the fall. These two had a lot of high points together, and for me this is right up there with their Backlash match as an example of them getting near as dammit everything right. Well recommended.

Final Thoughts: Overall this was a good show from a time when it was hard for the WWF to have a BAD show. Some questionable psychology in two of the midcard bouts aside, there was some good stuff with the opener, Eddie's charisma, the Shane O'Mac overbooking special and The Ballad of Gerry Brisco: Hardcore Champion & Feminist Icon. We also got some solid wrestling from the IC title match and the main event, the latter being one of the most overlooked matches in WWF history. So overall...

Final Verdict: STICK

"That's a keeper!